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Lame Game:
Targets those who ail
Making them tread deadly trail
The beastly Blue Whale
Style / type:
Structured: Eastern
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words:
Invasion of privacy (numerous social websites) , surveillance and eavesdropping (Big Boss) and mind control and torture (Blue Whale) are just social mirrors of the political environment, where all rights and privileges of the citizenry can be summarily suspended using the all encompassing and convenient cover of security. It is unfortunate that the name of the largest mammal has been misused for a convoluted, cruel and criminal game.
Editing stage:
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Comments
themoonman
Sat, 2017-09-23 16:28
Hi,
While I appreciate your passion,
if you have to write a paragraph
explaining your Haiku it has failed.
A Haiku stands on it's own and I
never would have understood the
poem without your comment.
OriginalRhyku
Sun, 2017-09-24 00:12
themoonman
Glad to see the man in the moon actually exists.
The explanation was to provide my own commentary on the connection between society and politics.
I think the Rhyku on its own clearly indicates that the game (beastly Blue Whale) targets those who are vulnerable (ail) and makes them progress on an series of tasks that ends in death (deadly trail).
I however welcome your opinion and defend your right to express your opinion.
Thanks.
OriginalRhyku
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