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Love, Hate, Fear and Trust

Love.
Where I come from; love is like rice.
No rice. No love.
Love, like rice doesn’t exist in a vacuum
Stew. Hate. Meat. Betrayal. Beans. Denial.
Above all; jollof rice. The height of infidelity.
Love is a moving train.
Who says trains don’t halt. Know your station.
Never jump out of a moving train
And don’t be carried away by the rail
“The rice farmer won’t say he won’t plant rice because after all,
It will be mixed with beans and meat and curry and thyme”
Above all, everyone eats rice. Everyone loves.
In different condiments. In different bowls. In different moulds
Hate.
I hate Sundays. My days of inertia
My Christian brethren love Sundays. They worship it. In it!
When we hate, we hate that that is loved by another.
It could be that we hate our most cherished possessions-
Like Sunday ushers in the week, and week- month
Why hate when you can walk away.
Hate, like killing a lizard, is a waste of feelings.
When we hate we care. And care is the mother of feelings.
So I sleep, read, think, until Sunday walks away.
And the lizard disappears with the darkness.
Fear.
It is easy to not fear God- the most innocuous
But man can hurt us now and hard
Man can steal your job and wife
Man can, kill your flock and cease your milk
Man can, blast you before your lord- profanity in the house of God
Is man not to be feared?
“I can sin and await my judgment in heaven. But I cannot
Confront a man with Kalashnikov head on”
Ittaqullah; but we don’t fear HIM
Is man then not to be feared?
Trust.
Because man is fallible. Weak. Loves. Lusts.
Not because no one is worthy of my trust.
I trust no one.

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Comments

Spoken like a true Nigerian my brother....i can totally relate
I definitely love jollof...sundays are boooring...Nice poem
Welcome to neopoet

I feel you have a lot of good stuff in this poem, but it takes on way too much without a common thread between the 4 themes in the title. I would break it down to a "quartet" and treat each separate. The first does not need the train theme to interfere with the rice and love connection which is unique and nicely done. "jollof" I assume is "Bowl of" Either way, I like the title:

BOWL OF LOVE

Where I come from; love is like rice.
No rice. No love.
Love, like rice doesn’t exist in a vacuum
Stew. Hate. Meat. Betrayal. Beans. Denial.
Above all; Bowl of rice. The height of infidelity.

The rice farmer doesn't say "I won’t plant rice,
Because, after all,
It will be mixed with beans and meat and curry and thyme”
Above all, everyone eats rice.
Everyone loves.

The second:

HATE

I hate Sundays. My days of inertia
My Christian brethren love Sundays. They worship it. In it!
When we hate, we hate that that is loved by another.
It could be that we hate our most cherished possessions.

Hate, like killing a lizard, is a waste of feelings.
When we hate we care. And care is the mother of feelings.
So I sleep, read, think, until Sunday walks away.
And the lizard disappears with the darkness.

I'm not sure exactly what you mean in fear. I do not see the connection between a god that's easy not to fear ( a VERY bold statement in a world in which the majority of souls do) and then followed by the savagery of humanity and finally
Ittaqullah (?); but we don’t fear HIM
Is man then not to be feared?

What is the connection between not fearing god and fearing man??

The last trust,. I don't think you need a period after trust, rather a comma, it is a continuation of the thought.

Trust.

Because man is fallible. Weak. Loves. Lusts.
Not because no one is worthy of my trust,
I trust no one.

This does make a statement. But this is more prose than poetry. It does not exist is a poetic universe of possibilities. perhaps the introduction of an image..like the lizard, or the rice, to connect the theme?

As you know this site is about honest commentary, and I hope mine is helpful. It is difficult to take on 4 very highly charged ideas as connect them in a short poem. Sometimes in poetry, less is more .

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

You're getting it wrong...in Nigeria, jollof rice is a type of rice, it like oriental rice or fried rice...it's one of our best food, you should try it out

And I think all poets should please try to include such things in the notes of a poem; things not common knowledge or personal references that nobody could possibly know. I have never seen a Nigerian restaurant but would love to try it !

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

as we all are not used to your kinda life
you should have specified
JOLLOf what!

take care u r a new comer here
twill take time to know neo

read more first and know
how we all flow
then only jollof at us
throw
you may like to with us
grow

I understand what rice mean in Nigeria the way you portrays it in your poem as a replica of love, i also understand hate from Sundays from your perspective, fear for man rather than God, and trust because man is not emotionally constant or trust worthy.
i suggest you put more work to the poem
nice one

always remember to make a critique of other poems
using the hoe is not madness for nothing

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