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Delivering Male

I'm secure in my maleness,
never give it a thought
but after events this morning
even I said " what "?

To me it was cold,
sporting two shirts,
had to get the girls up
for school and work.

My daughter had made
a delicate bracelet,
pink and yellow beads,
in my hair, she placed it.

I turned off the fans,
my wife likes it cold,
but here I was shivering,
needing a coat.

And glowing before me,
was her thick robe,
mango's and flowers,
looking warm don't ya know.

I set about the morning,
ridding last night's mess,
when all of a sudden
a loud knock from the steps.

It was my good buddy David,
grinning ear to ear,
said "how ya doin darlin"
"is your husband here"

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

That is absolutely the funniest thing I've read for a while. You drew it perfectly that I can see you stunned in front of your friend, shining with that colorful robe with mangos and flowers you said?

And that last line...hilarious!!!

If it happened again and you managed to get a selfie, please e-mail it to
Miss USA official site. You might have luck to be the one. (((smiles)))

PS. the spelling cop says you need an apostrophe ...... ridding last night[']s mess

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Thank you, I'm glad to tickle your funny bone but
there will be no selfies (lol), you made my morning!!!

PS; thanks for the heads up, I fixed the possessive.

Richard with no pictures lol.

author comment

So, so funny Richard
I love it
the mind absolutely boggles - I envision it so clearly, and every time I think about it I giggle
Thanks for my daily smile
Love judy
xxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Hope all is well on your end of the world,
as you can see mine is teetering on its
own edges lol.

luv and hugz and mango ...

Richard

author comment

LOL this is a gem that is all I can say I'm still laughing

Chrys
Let your mercy spill on all these burning hearts in hell(Leonard Cohen)

Thanks for reading and commenting and I'm
glad you liked it.

Richard

author comment

Classic - :)

Brilliant xxx

Love Mand xxx

Glad you liked it. My daughter is so bad,
she is constantly wanting to put eye shadow
on me, I won't let her. I did concede to let her
paint one fingernail, a little finger, she painted
it neon green ...

Richard

author comment

Typical girl. - so cute, I can imagine what you would look like after she'd finished - specially unshaven. Lol

can we have a picture pleasssssse, want to see what a mountain man looks like cuddled by flowers.
LOL made us smile, thanks, Yours, Ian, sweetie

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

No No NO .... no pictures lol,

hope all is well on your side of
the pond my fine feathered friend.

Richard

author comment

I have often wonder why the Moonman title lol,
Now the secret is out.
I picture a fully grow mountain man sitting on a bluff in full moonlight being attended by a lot of flower fairies singing soft lullabies to them,
or is that you sat in a field making daisy chains, lol
We is all fine over here, and as a Moonraker can see the many torments this has caused.. La La
Have a great day and love to all your family.
Yours, Ian

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

I kinda always suspected you were not an ordinary guy but never thought of you as a cross dresser lmao. Very funny slice of life Richard............stan

I didn't mention the lingerie ... oh, wait,
oooops.

lol
thanks Stan.

author comment

Life can have a lot more humor than imagination.........stan

see how cross he is and we mustn't mention this again Eh!! lol,
Yours Sparrow

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

So real, so true.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Hi Richard, after your helpful input with my recent post, I wanted to check out some of your work. This was the 1st to catch my eye and I'm glad it did. It's written so well, that the read was a breeze! The visuals I got while reading it were so clear in my head. By the time I got to the end I was already sitting here with a smile on my face and your last line had me laughing out loud!!!!! it's such a gloomy, chilly, day here, so I really needed something to brighten it, and this poem has!

Thanks so sharing it. I'm relatively new to the site so I'd not been aware of it till now. Things happen for a reason and your reviewing my poem lead me to this one! So, it all worked out the way it should, at least that's what I'm thinking!

val

So glad I could help with a smile,
that's what it's all about.

appreciate your looking and commenting,
Richard

author comment

Non hateful...welcoming.and damn
they are funny!
world today full of hate
backbiters and ankle crawlers
but U continue to post poetry
and put up works
where others give lame excuses
Excellent write!

glad to have U back mate!

Tah
Cheers!

Mr Wolf!

You and your poetry are part of
the reason I've held on so long here,

thanks,
Richard

author comment

'Twas truly my pleasure! And again thanks for making a gloomy day less gloomy!

Val

I remember your down home philosophy..
many of the Merkican peoples came to Ontario
Work related and getting north
back in the day!

LAughed at this one!!
I have to drive the Princesses
bike....I got a Man Bike
coming soon.
But hers is a Pink Bike
White forks...
most people just say
nice bike!
but she will shoot me
if she knew...
Getting an old beater
soon thats been laying
against a garage for
two years...Love tinkering
with cool stuff...
Had many wheels under
me over the years...
not about the horse U ride
but if You love it and care
for it.....and the Man above!
Thankx Dude!

Happy Halloween!!!

Mr Wolf!

We have a moon man in a lovely dressing gown, and not to mention the undies, now coming over the hill is a Wolf riding a pink bicycle.
Has anyone else some things to make me smile..
Yours Ian, with no frills..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

it is a smile!

enjoy!

Mr Wolf!

A great story in the papers here this morning that Red Riding Hood was a Wolf on a bicycle peddling like hell going to visit Grand dad who lived in a lovely house..but he was disguised as a Granny in a beautiful dressing gown hoping the Wolf wouldn't hurt him.
The stories I believe are made up but who knows, I am trying to find out.
They say the story was put out by the Sydney newspaper after an anonymous bushman who had a Kookaburra on his shoulder, spoke to a reporter lol
Love it, there is a great epic poem in here some place, Take care love you all, Yours Ian
PS:- there s no news as to what happened to Granny yet will keep you updated La La

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

on another site..
they got a GIF
says....."I stick with the wolf
He can see U better..
Hear U better
and Eat U better"

my females read Fifty Shades of Grey
three times over...

My gran dad was not a decent person
ask the children
but he feared ghosts..
Lucky me!!
I feared not the night nor darkness!!
not after what happened to us!

might be why I have no respect
for abusers!
and my world wide contacts
bring me intel
and stories....

I do like that at least Your children
who visit U are happy ones...
in spirit world
because my adult women
who grew up with miserable
males who put them down
and said things to their face
like "Ding dong the witch is dead"
would be happy to see such
sayers of sooth dead..
nothing that six thou cant fix

U are a classified man...
your communications work
against the communist threat
still relevant
your file full
As any gov worker
They know when U pick your
nose....take out your dustbin
and the super hackers
who work for the strangest
things
cough up all new News

But I like U!

sometimes
sometimes
sometimes

the wolf does not care
its a metaphor..
an allegoric comment
like an algorythym
oh
did I say gory
well it is Halloween..

Happy halloween everyone!
Mr WOLF!

Oh my goodness!!! the visuals I got from this piece!!! I snorted my coffee, ack! :)

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Forget what you saw lol,

thanks,

Richard

author comment

you do not miss a beat do you lol I totally enjoyed this write

Chrys
Let your mercy spill on all these burning hearts in hell(Leonard Cohen)

Thank you for reading and commenting on
one of my poems.

I find it hard to believe I said anything close
to "your poetry doesn't compare to mine",
I'm a pretty humble guy and a rookie poet
in my own view, so it doesn't sound like
anything I might say. If I said something to
make you think that was the way I felt, I'm
truly sorry, it was never my intention.

thanks again,
Richard

author comment

you are soft and kind
another UK poet
clearly told me around 2011/12 or so
stay away from my poetry
Well I stopped commenting
Glad you clear the misconception
I shall remove the last discussion
Thanks..

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