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Nobody Special

Maybe I see
What no one else can
Dreaming an everlasting dream
Believing in everlasting lies
Hoping to be someone
To somebody, when everyone
Is nobody special

What is it that you see
Every time you look straight
Through me, past everything
Staring into the darkness

So ugly that the
Reflection of me is
Repulsive
Hating to love, loving to hate
It's pointless, useless

It doesn't matter at all
Take it back
It's serving no purpose
Doing nothing but wasting
Away my days

Take it back
I don't care where it goes
Give it away if you wish
To nobody special
Hoping to be someone
To somebody

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

excellent musing on the ways of modern love
Was talking to my Bunni about this kind of
condition...About how the men took much
expected all and gave little in return!
Now I gave much....the motto was "Who
else was going to take this up?"
mastering the loads and limits by being
out beyond the wire far and long..
patrol excursions following people in
their madness and addictions..
their obsession with the unattainable
based on the looks and their loins...
Just because I strove to prove it to
them with little in return other then
What else can we get him to do?
eventually proved to myself that I
can do a lot....accomplish much
and still find time for happiness
in my own world not just based on
someones love or approval
Lust or all the gifting!

Dark roses...like pulling off the
petals....She...or he loves me not
Male or female persona sad
the Harlequin scene!

I remember a couple I knew..
he would buy flowers....and plants
and she would let them die
The room would hold glass
vases with dried flowers...
the roses drooping....hung
up as decorative pieces
they resembled a chandelier
an odd couple...

Of the people I left who went
on to more other people..
some are satisfied...and yet
still others have cash....
property over a hundred
fifty thousand dollars on
the market...Great jobs
and still they are not connected
enough to get it together
and losing ground...
an unhappiness settled into
their bones like permafrost
but I
gained experience and self
worth from all that effort

I remember the Red Hot Chili
Peppers line..
give it away
give it away
..
Love that band!
Love the song about addiction
they did and accompanying
video...

I am today worth much..
although I stay in a chaotic
relationship...when they
would put me in the corner
or disregard my Love affection
by pushing me away and
throwing it on others who
were useless...(In my eyes)
and they did just cause
grief! Eventually my
value as the old servant
butler...groundskeeper
arose...
Not a king maybe but
a loyal enough old knight
while the kingdom crumbled

I think U are pretty cool
Brilliant minded writing
I used to think I was very
ugly..Im not handsome
and when women said I
was attractive and found
fondness to me..I thought
it was a trick...and the Oh
Boy club as I thought about
it only wanted me about
when they wanted jobs
done that they figured
they were too wealthy
too uppity to do themselves
after awhile I just created
my own Brand of Me!
it was hard doing things
for me...a long struggle
much depression and
addiction...
but I got through the gauntlet
For those who do not see
your worth or value
Diss they!
see who they can come
up...how long that lasts
as I said..Good Luck with
that!
So all the beautiful spinner
and gorgeous women who
liked me and expressed
interest beyond mere coffee
were not joking after all!
Too late...but Im like
well...that was very noble
of them!

Someone to yourself
Someone to your own
somebody
self esteem and self worth
is hard work and much
belief...there are so many
who will tear you down
belittle you...set you up
and betray U...I know
been there...felt those
lashes...
today I do not accept
friendship from these kind
of people...
I like and love the kind of
people that throw their
effort into bettering themselves
sharing the load of work
with others...and giving
Majority just take....
give you shit for not having
more...crush your spirit
maybe at one time I believed
their words...but my inner
voice just took over..
the loving sharing caring
people never stopped
believing
till I know believe...
that I am very real

But for a poem about
this kind of feeling
this is bang on..
I felt this every day
for most of my life
and just took a lot
of dissing...Lost
a lot this way over
the years....

very well writting
and full of feeling
captures that sadness
and ache

thank U!

Mr Wolf!

Daisies and Dark Roses, you do have a way with words, love roses my favorite. When I was young, just like most kids I wanted everyone to like me. But when it came to guy's, the one's I liked never liked me, and the one's that liked me I never liked, story of my life. But now, I really don't care what people think of me, I like me just the way I am. I don't need anyone's approval, love me or hate me, it will not change my life. I have grown very cynical, don't believe in love any more, love of family yes, love between man and woman no. It is all lust and passion and there is nothing wrong with that, it just never lasts and men never stay.

author comment

I really like what you said with:

"But now, I really don't care what people think of me, I like me just the way I am. I don't need anyone's approval, love me or hate me, it will not change my life"

I think that is the right attitude to have!

however, I disagree with the part about all men leaving in the end. I want you to know that I have been married to the same man for 30+ years. he is always kind and loving and when we occasionally disagree, he never *hits below the belt (it is called fair fighting with no low blows. we discuss rather than calling names) my wish for you, is that you find your special someone very soon)

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

some can say women never keep U...
many times my box of things dumped on the road
like a cat or dog...away they go...
dreaming of them returning..
I love U I changed my mind.....
but no...
I was cynical and keep one eye open
one eye closed now...
More business now...
The Great Love..Romance...I still believe
in if not for me then others...
still love movies...even Avatar lately
made me swoon!
but...I can keep believing...
even at my old age...

rejection is heavy business

thank U for the poetry
and words Jasmine!

I still buy roses...they smell
wonderful
commercial or the wild!

Mr Wolf!

I really like these lines:

Take it back
I don't care where it goes
Give it away if you wish
To nobody special
Hoping to be someone
To somebody

because they still relate a wish to belong...there is still hope left in you!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem.

I do not look for love anymore, I have lost my faith in it, but that does not mean I am not happy for those that have found it and hold it tightly with their heart and soul. Some people just never find their other half, who knows why, but I have excepted that . Maybe in my next life!

author comment

Yes of course you are right, women also leave or more often kick you out, that is what I did. But he was not faithful so he deserved what he got. But then again I was also at fault, I never really loved him, so I also deserved what I got. I think I am lazy when it comes to love and love is to complicated when it comes to me, so we have agreed to disagree.
I also enjoy talking to you, thank you

author comment

Another great write, there hidden deep in the forest is an orchid the most beautiful flower in the world, but to whom is it in beauty.
To those that can imagine such a flower, then it only has to exist in the dreams of a woman or man, many of us can see the flower, in seeing it, it becomes.
Your writing brings a lovely change to the normal run of poetry here, no wonder you have captured Esker.
Take care and will read more,
Yours Ian.x

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Thank you so much, even your comment is a lovely poem!

author comment

they all end up alone cause they dont see value in
keeping bridges...
if people see you burn a bridge
why would they want to build one...
for love..friendship
got no respect...once they get their
worth..up it goes..they dont want
to give...be rational...listen...
take their lumps for the lies
and cries they give...
islands they become...
seen many like this
not me man...I love the social
trail...the little pack buddies
I got all over...men women
I share coin...smokes...
do runs..put in the effort
keeps me in shape
they share stories and
intel which is very very
valuable...
"You dont say..well isnt that interesting"
gives me poetry storys

the crushed and repressed are prolli
more brighter then the opressors
cause they got all the time in the
world alone...get in your room
shutup and sit down..
yer doing it wrong...yadda yadda
so U got time...they go away
bossing others about
primping their egos
gorging on the emotional trauma
they cause....
eventually you come up with a
plan...an existance...
ask any prisoner who does time
..
but then again Ive met a lot of
super victims too
I tried to help one who kept
getting in with the abusive
scene or at least thats what
she used for attention
why I dont like whiners..
she said..Well hes a hot mess
but hes my hot mess..
I just deleted her from facebook
still going..
I like people that grow not
make excuses for shitty behavoiur
I expect greatness and goodness
not shit talk or crap
and I respect action
my culture defines this
my worth asks of this

a hell of a good poem
about that condition
when your sad and
angry and dont know
what to do..
just kicking stones
in your best sunday
clothes...

Bravo Jasmine!
Mr Me!

When your sad and angry and don't know what to do......just kicking stones in your Sunday clothes.

Even your comments are poetry! Thank you!
I will try my best to be worthy of your praise.

author comment

because most are afraid to take a risk...metaphor would be saying there is a hole
in the Holland dyke but they dont want to risk plugging the hole with their finger..
My adopted family is dutch! so I loved the mythical stories!! Me....I would be
like .."Watch this"...and stick my finger in the "Leak"
I clean houses..paint rooms..move people...run to pick up shit for them...
clean outside..takes five minutes...spend half an hour doing the old school
chat and move on...next thing....
give out smokes to the homies downtown....toonies..2 dollars canadian coin
trade stuff.....working the crowd and giving a shit..most or a lot would rather
con u out of your money and steal your stuff....

Karmas a bitch....and Write poetry....I just keep on writing
Kerouack as crazy as he loved it lived it and wrote about it...
Sexton too...all her crap she put herself through and all
her haters she just wrote......And all her work is dark and
thoughtful provocative but she never wrote Negativity
against others...The mark of a true Poet...a strength
and credible nobility to rise away from the true world
who just nit pick....
Ginsberg was openly homesexual but he never wrote
anti gay rhetoric....he never bashed females
He wrote Poetry......Poetry is not about hate...
about feelings and passion and what not...
I write a lot about Love...
complicated scenes of passion
but there is not much anti or hate in
the work itself...
Darkness yes!!
and dressing well..

Thank U....
gone are the days of praise
and more the world is turning
to just cutting each other
with rueful comments..
my friends on the street
this morning were talking
about this..
I find value in encouragement
a greater value
then negative abuse..

Thank U my new friend Jasmine!
Mr Wolf!

Good to have a friend on this site, so thank you!

author comment

u are of brilliance..as I
lets survive

bravamissio

!!

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