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Submitted by Geezer on Sun, 2015-12-27 20:53

See who is there, passing by
The dark-side-shows
Eyes that glitter

Pasted grins, think they are sly

I know the thoughts, flitting
Body tells tell
Treasure fingers

Swagger cool, think they are fly

Magic-morons, rich-bitches
Fooling most all
Skating on thin ice

Scared shit-less, living the lie

Darkness dripping, like a wet cape
Strangers alone
Lost in the crowd

More than meets the eye

Evil incarnate, peeking out low
Look and they hide
Feet tell the tale

Paths that they trod,troubles they spy

See the dark-side, look and they hide
Drink up life-blood
Brains they've eaten

I smell the essence, they do not cry

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Last few words: 
Just trying something new. Will try to smooth it out later.
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Esker

Mon, 2015-12-28 05:16

Esker's picture

I can tell its new....
a careful feel to this
U know they are out there
like kendo
no strikes at U
back
feeling out the crowd

if they were given the
weapons
would they strike U out

god love america

Geezer

Tue, 2015-12-29 09:45

Geezer's picture
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for the read and comment, I guess that you have had an influence on this one. Yes, a new feel to it!
Sometimes, I just can't get it out, but this one just seemed to flow beneath my four-fingered typing!
This one was born after sitting at the table, drinking coffee in the mall. I see the dark-side some times, Just glimpses, but it is always there, waiting... ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Geremia

Fri, 2016-01-01 16:53

Geremia's picture

you describe it beautifully. Evil is out there. I've "encountered"" it, but I don't talk about except to my priest. No, I wasn't going nuts, The "incident" while I was in hospital--AND when I returned home-[. It was familiar to my doctor and my priest. "Bad things" happen in that hospital,. BUT Good is also out there.

I loved your images/ Wonderfully done.

Cbristus tecum,
'
Joe

P.S, And no, I don't have foam colming out of my mouth...not yet anyway. LOL

Geezer

Fri, 2016-01-08 23:53

Geezer's picture
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the experiences of sitting in a crowded public place and watching the people and catching glimpses of truly evil faces. The kind that reveals the inner person when they drop their guard. Yes, there is evil out there. I don't dwell on it though. Ying and Yang, you know. it's only natural to keep balance. thanks for the read and comments, they are much appreciated. ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Esker

Wed, 2015-12-30 09:52

Esker's picture

all around.....our most blighted are the most brightest that tend our days with
water and sun...shadow and breeze.
their taste for it...

and then the inner darkness....
prowling forever....

but today Im working inside the house..detail work
slow to get going
enjoy your comments and poems Geezer
thank U !

Geezer

Sat, 2016-01-09 00:05

Geezer's picture
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Dark, that I fear, is that of the soul. Even as one that is what I would call an Agnostic, I believe that there is an essence of a person that doesn't die, but continues to grow and have purpose. When I see a dark or evil soul, I am worried for the people around them, wondering if they know. I'm always slow to get going on personal tasks, I guess that I feel that if the duty is only mine, I can take my time and often get side tracked. Oh well, back to work.
P.S. My thanks to you! It is always a pleasure to hear what you have to say about my work. ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Sparrow

Fri, 2016-01-01 18:58

Sparrow's picture
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A good write on the bad side,
I have a message from Digit he loves this and is waiting for me to write about his trip to Oklahoma some car show on route 66, I shall sort it out soon lol..
Take care and have a great New Year,
Yours, Jack and Digit, La, La..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Geezer

Sat, 2016-01-09 00:08

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that you and Digit like this one. By all means, write that poem! We eagerly await your efforts and perspective on a great car show! Thanks, from ~ Gee and Killer

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Roscoe Lane

Sun, 2016-01-10 03:25

Roscoe Lane's picture

We all walk the same streets, stalked by the same evils, unfortunately. Another good poem. Regards Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

Geezer

Sun, 2016-01-10 14:18

Geezer's picture
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So glad that you like this. ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment
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