Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Beautiful British Blackbird

Beautiful little blackbird
Greeting the first light of dawn
Fluting and chirping his repertoire
Richly waking a sweet summer morn.

Standing atop a gate post
Singing his song so mellow
Distracting and attracting a mate
With his bill and eye ring of yellow.

Plumping his feathery suit
Darting his beak in the soil
Stretching and pulling out juicy worms
That wriggle and curl in a coil.

Fiercely defending his patch
Calling his siren alarm
Flicking and fretting his rival foes
With his usual elegant charm.

Seeking a succulent lunch
Probing the bushes and scrubs
Scratching and prodding the leaf litter
Ever hunting for berries and grubs.

Enjoying bountiful days
Having some seasonal fun
Bathing and splashing in rain puddles
And spreading his wings in the sun.

As the evening sun sets
His voice is last to be heard
Serenading and filling the air
With the sounds of this beautiful bird.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

You amazed me with your poem.
one bird/much details/long poem/ poetry style I can’t write.,.,.and who can do except a great poet

Mona Rose

I envy the bird too. Lol Thank you for such lovely comments Mona - coming from a poet such as yourself I am honoured. I am soo looking forward to summer days when the bird song is at its best. - you have delighted us with some wonderful summer poems.

I hope you and your family are all o.k.

Keep safe, enjoy life.

Thank you for reading and commenting.

Love Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

this write creates such lovely imagery ..it is captivating and the detailing shows how observant you must be,....

much love..

raj (sublime_ocean)

Good to hear from you my friend - The common blackbird and the song thrush - top of the list in the British Isles for their melodius songs, a true delight to listen to, especially in the spring/summer months when they are trying to attract a mate.

Thank you kind Raj for your lovey comments and for reading.

Love to you

Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

With this wonderfully descriptive lyrical poem you show that you have an eye for detail and a the ability to describe it so clearly.

I do envy that ! :-)

Some amazing detail here.

Psyve

Woow! Everyone is giving such lovely comments - They are all really encouraging.

Thank you so much for your lovely words.

Love to you

Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

The ol' black tux gets them every time lol. With such a poem about a common black bird, what could you do with a cardinal or blue jay...........................stan

I once, very fleetingly, saw a jay ( not the same as yours - ours is pink ) but I've never seen a cardinal, except on you tube. Both are very very pretty. Does your blackbird have a white tux? Ours are all black - though sometimes, in rare instances, individuals have white splashes on them.

I thought you might appreciate this one being a man who loves the woodlands and forests.

And you have given us some wonderful poems about nature.

Thanks for coming by Stan

Love Mand

author comment

Our black birds are generally solid black with some subspecies having red or red and yellow patches at the outside wing bases.............stan

Extremely good read .

Love Lou

Stand tall, be proud to be who you are, give the world the finger!!!!

Nice to hear from you, hope you're o.k. Sorry I haven't been around recently - super busy.

Thanks for your sweet, kind comment.

Being a Londoner I expect you see and hear plenty of blackbirds, they say that sparrows are in short supply in London.

Keep safe my friend.

Love Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

How are yah? Good to hear from you. Ahh! long summer days will soon be upon us. I look forward to hearing all the vibrant sounds that only spring/summer can bring.

Thank you my lovely! for your comment and for reading.

Love always.

Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

I hear music sometimes. Poems within poems.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3VrggQW7tk

~

Thank you Anna, I thoroughly enjoyed a serene few minutes of lovely soft music, think I'll play it again.

Much appreciated

Love Mand xxxxxx

author comment

Enjoyed this rendering of the classic Beatles' "Blackbird" song.
Thanks for sharing.
P

Always nice to hear from you. I hope the weather is a bit better in Scotland at the moment and that you and Zak are feeling well.

Glad you liked the peom - plenty of Blackbirds visit our back garden - sometimes I sit and observe their behaviour ( a sign of old age perhaps ) Lol

Like all birds they have their own characteristics, I particularly love the blackbird because of its beautiful song! especially in the morning and evening chorus.

Thanks Xena for reading and commenting, much appreciated.

Love Mand xxxxxxxxx

author comment

lovely poem here
your rhythm is, as always, perfect for the write
i really enjoyed this
love judy
xxxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Really good to hear from you - I hope everything is going well for you.

Sorry I haven't been around much! I'll try and put that right next week.

Thanks for your encouraging comment. Keep safe

Love Mand xxxxxx

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.