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Narcoleptic Days
I'm so sleepy
my hands falling when I play games
my head bobbing when I read
I'm drowsy from all the medication in my system
sugar, glaucoma, heart, cholesterol, pain
is what's consumed on a daily
now Antibiotics to kill the infection
cycling my body for months and months
tomorrow that broken tooth comes out.
Nothing I do shakes
these narcoleptic days.
Editing stage:
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Comments
Esker
Mon, 2015-04-06 00:54
only after my Bunni ran through sickness....
I came looking through for those unvisited
like a trail not ventured on...no footprints
I read this before three times...
now I walked through the forest today
peaceful..settled...
tired and sleepy....though I try not
too...Dreams are my broken tooths
I have sleep anpnea..so they say
from all the admissions
i keep waking up so I dont care...
I think of the creative writers
souls..singers I liked..
many were already gone ahead
when I listened to them or
read them....
Life is like a sickness
do what one can to cure
its ailments..and affects
hoping for the best...
Your writing style I still
find unique and original
i see patterns...an old
intuition...The voice
of your works never
fails to draw me in..
the story always
compelling..
Bunni got sick with
many things over a
three year period
awful times...
quick recovery
and doing well
today...
there is this patient
calmness in the
storm of storyline
of your work
that I like
Thank You!
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2015-04-08 01:39
Thanks Steve
As always I like winded critique and story shared. Oh bunni continue to get better
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Sparrow
Mon, 2015-04-06 04:17
Barbara
As Steve says you have a unique style and this is what I was talking about when saying about critique, your style crosses all the borders of form and is lovely to read as it is in truth,
Yours as always, Ian xx
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2015-04-08 01:40
Thanks Ian
As always your critique are helpful and appreciated.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
raj
Wed, 2015-04-08 14:36
Barbara
You are an icon for courage and determination. I wish and pray for you to get well soon.
Warm regards,
raj (sublime_ocean)
Barbara Writes
Fri, 2015-04-10 02:02
Thanks
Life is rough but you must keep moving
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community