Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

MUTTERKADE DOSE METER

Submitted by Esker on Mon, 2015-02-02 23:42

lOCK IN
your world away
I will vanish
and even if
you pick the
lock and drag
me out

I will be
within

The chrome
in the heat
the vinyl seats

the ashtray
open like a
mouth
the lipstick
like rose
kisses
on the cork
livid
and no where
the xx's

How I lived
beside the brew
of your soul
iradiated
with a healthy scale

sizzling like a
cancer
this crackle of
the anger
entrancing
cellophane
happiness

we drove the needle
steady at sixty
but you were aloof
and dead at seventy

i can feel your love
your hate glowing
in me
the Princess's
gift a chrome
zippo

she knows loves
a poison
I stand in the
dark of the
little porch
staring at the
silence of the
stars

my little flare
an ingot
of dare
sharing
the threats
of disease

....

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

vandiemenspeak

Tue, 2015-02-03 08:17

vandiemenspeak's picture
Volunteer badge

Theme, perhaps intensely personal - so no need to pry behind the curtain, but the language use I found striking, it augured a memory of hot buses, and long nights in the city - and prodded the senses - I particularly liked
"I stand in the
dark of the
little porch
staring at the
silence of the
stars"

I could happily read that line all night alone like a mantra..

Thank you for tuning in on a particularly poignant moment (I'm imagining) for you, and broadcasting it to the rest of us. Nice one.

Cheers Esker, take it easy,

Chris.

Chris Hall - Tasmania

Grossbooted draymen rolled barrels dullthudding out of Prince's stores and bumped them up on the brewery float. On the brewery float bumped dullthudding barrels rolled by grossbooted draymen out of Prince's stores.

judyanne

Tue, 2015-02-03 11:14

judyanne's picture
Volunteer badge

One of you best imo
I am reading it over and over
Absolutely especially enjoying the last three stanzas, I wish I had written those final two at least - they are pure poetry

Thank you for sharing Steve
I will come back frequently to read this

Love judy
xxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.