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Heinous
no Houdini escape for you
mired in guilt
no one can remove
for you are guilty
nothing psychological about it
no words
no pills
no woo
can make it un-so
an arm around your shoulder is compassion
not forgiveness, nor understanding
time will not be a gift
forgetting will be denied
leaving a scarred,
disfigured mind
left groveling for peace
with only pittances donated by strangers
pitying a dark brooding shell
wreaking of death
and self loathing
wishing you gone
never wanting to know, or be close to
you
become familiar with your grave
the only welcome you will ever know again
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
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Comments
Ian.T
Wed, 2014-12-31 19:08
Al
I hope I never upset you, what a grand write and followed a story, so stark, great!
Yours Ian.T
Have a great 2015..
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
brittle light
Thu, 2015-01-01 15:18
Hello Ian
thank you very much for your comments and time
don't be too hard on others for not commenting often...life is a busy place for most people, even poets. I am , like a few others, old now. What else do we have to do but putter around looking to fill our time with something....ah! check out Neopoet for half a day at a time...not everyone has this leisurely opportunity.
Maybe we all should write better poems...that might draw them in like swarming locusts...or turn poetry into a team sport, that would fill our stadium for sure
later, regards, happy hoopla and 2015
Al
emogothgirl
Wed, 2014-12-31 21:52
agreed.
love love love the adjectives overflowing here. top notch descriptions and imagery my man. great job.
mag
brittle light
Thu, 2015-01-01 15:28
I am pleased that this worked
I am pleased that this worked to some degree...
thanks for reacting, feedback is always appreciated, especially from someone who knows the trade.
thanks again, Mag
Al