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Paynim...

It's been said,
now...
time and peace
have graceful hands
of passover...

Peace...
Peace...
Peace
drizzles in pieces of dawn
Of ripped ribbons of night

As pensile moments
rip the paternoster
from my breast...
As the enduring face
of Evil affixed
his last patch...

I became the before
the Paynim of infinity...
sitting at the feet
of the Pedagogue
within in the mother...

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Long time no see, I'll catch up with everyone over the coming days...Merry Christmas... And a most wonderful New Year...
Editing stage: 

Comments

...so, what did you learn? (at the feet of the teacher)...never mind, the perceived experience is a kind of knowledge in itself, is it not?

a very nice depiction. You write well. (but, you already know that!)
Funny, every word I needed to look up on google started with the letter "P" (planned, coincidence, or prescience of something to come!!!..sorry, just playing some woo woo games on you.

Glad to see you here again...we come and go, like the wind, but always someplace.

I'm becoming incoherent, even to myself...so, gotta go

regards,

Al

The P thing you noticed its prescience. ..and all I am going to say, Iol, I will be around more over the coming weeks I am still recovering its been a really long year I will be glad when it is over, its not a year I will look back at and have many fond memories...but lifes moving forward and I am grabbing his coattails and moving along with it ...

thanks for the kind welcome back, I will try NOT to wear it out, giggle. ..

much love J x

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

it is enough to listen to the "sound" of your words. The meaning is secondary.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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Thats a brilliant compliment, thank you I must still have Something, this was pure inspiration, with a very small amount of work lol

thank you

love J x

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

It is enough that you are here and have written something also letting us know that you will be here more soon.
The darkness is clearing,
and I send thanks to those that have cared for you.
I shall look more for messages from you but I guess you are tired and I can wait till the day you are better, I also looked up the "P" words as usual well that old dictionary is really working lol.
Take care young Lady and know that we hold you in our thoughts each day, this is as good as real holds lol.
All our thoughts to you, Yours Ian and the Children xxx

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I have missed you very much, sorry I've not messaged I am very tired still most days..I sleep and sleep lots and I'm on a regime of drugs but slowly they are being minimised bit by bit..its getting late here I will cut your message short here and send you a longer private message

thanks for the read you know it is always appreciated

much love always and forever xxxxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Nice to be reading your work again - Wow this one is deep! I too had to look up the "P" words, there's an example of a paternoster on you tube! I think it is a very descriptive word for a continuous feeling / feelings. This type of poem needs to be read and re-read ( much like Shakespeare ), but it's worth the effort, because it's like treasure bought up to the surface! ( if that makes sense ).

You are so very good at expressing your feelings!

Love to you

Mand xxxxx

Hope you had a joyous Christmas with the family...thank you for the kind word's im just easing my way back into it...the words come with with ease these days it seems like I have a new voice and im trying it out...I thank you again for the kind words...

with love and hugs Jayne xxxxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

hope you are doing better...

much love...

raj (sublime_ocean)

I may never be a hundred percent I have permanent lose of feeling in my whole right leg, I have some loss of feeling in my left leg and Eccentric I am, I refused a wheelchair in favour of a walking stick I am getting a little better day by day but we cant knopw exactly how much damage was done to my spinal cord so I move forward refusing to look back.....with physiotherapy and my determination some things may improve we cant know until I try...and try I will

love and hugs Jayne xxxxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

I wish you lots of will power, determination and courage to come through the agony you are going through which is pretty perceptible from what you have said. Besides you are an Aussie girl with a die hard spirit which would certainly help in the therapy and treatment you are undergoing.

My very best wishes for you to keep on the get well graph.

Much love and warm hugs,

raj (sublime_ocean)

My favorite lines:
Peace...
Peace...
Peace...
drizzles in pieces of dawn
Of ripped ribbons of night

This makes me want to get up and watch the night go and the dawn come.
Happy New Year! Love you, ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you I am so glad you enjoyed it, ive slowly been answering these but im at an end...when I am not tired later on I shall be back to send you and a few others messages

with higgliest bugs wrapping you in love xxxxx

let Wendy know I will be back on FB very soon id love to catch up with you all xxxxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Thank you I am so glad you enjoyed it, ive slowly been answering these but im at an end...when I am not tired later on I shall be back to send you and a few others messages

with higgliest bugs wrapping you in love xxxxx

let Wendy know I will be back on FB very soon id love to catch up with you all xxxxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Thank you I am so glad you enjoyed it, ive slowly been answering these but im at an end...when I am not tired later on I shall be back to send you and a few others messages

with higgliest bugs wrapping you in love xxxxx

let Wendy know I will be back on FB very soon id love to catch up with you all xxxxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

She has asked if you are alright. Told her that I saw you on Neo and that you were [ alright, that is].
Said that you are recovering slowly. Keep it up! Love and higgest bugs, ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Glad to see you back, hun. I'm still recovering from surgery myself. Just have the heart pacer to steady my heartbeat. I missed you and the rest of our friends alot. With the technical problem and the pain, the days seem to drag and so sad and lonely.
You've got some good words in this piece, my friend and I don't have to say it 'cos you lready know you are one helluva poet...Check out "To Jayne With Love" when you have the time

Till we meet again, lots of hugs and love
Alid

My stupid computer melts down just in time for me to miss out on seeing you get back to writing again! Now you send me to Webster to find out what a "paynim" is lol. So good to see you back and know you're feeling better........stan

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