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Saying No To Red Lolly Pop

Love was everywhere
In high school
girls and boys made babies

but boys would say
“It's not my baby”

girls with big bellies
looked a fool
with no baby daddy.

in my heart, I said
“I'm not falling in love
with a boy
or having sex”.

“he won't treat me that way”
“No” was my favorite word
ever since first grade”.

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How can I say one poem was good and the other was bad?
You can hear it yourself in the reading aloud.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

I wrote this a month ago within a lengthy rant poem that the other poem is part of. I revised this small part of it for posting. Glad you like. I'll revise the other but it's a different poem intended to rhyme so I'll need to think on it. I'm glad you critiquing my work.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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