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The Right Word WS TREES by Philip Larkin

The trees are grind into leaf
Like dust almost being said
The recent buds sprout and spread
Their greenness is a kind of grief

Is it that they are green again
And we feel old? No, they grew too
Their yearly trick of looking new
Is written down in rings of grain

Yet still the unresting leaf thresh
In fullgrown tree every May
Last year hallelujah amen they seem to say,
Begin afresh, afresh, again

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Check tense in line 1 first stanza . Your rewrite is pretty far from the original yet it reads well which goes to show there can be more than one right word..........stan

I'll make the changes

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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