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Can you make a limerick serious?

1.
You can tear my clothes, if you wish
Rape me too that’s what you like to fish
But play safe use a bloody condom
Don’t go about fucking at random
Our concoction will make a relishing dish

2.
She looked at me in broad day light
With eyes as wide open as a kite
She smelled the odour I issued
Then wanted me to be sued
Did she know might is right?

3.
I once had a master named Bess
too damned strict I must confess
every time I joked
he felt unduly poked
yet he managed not to show distress

4.
I can't actually and really hear
O my gosh, darling what, a dear
So make no bloody mistake
Here is my stinking retake
Now of your shrink I have no fear

5.
I dare say my dear moonman sire
I do agree with Raj the poet entire
but you are my mentor
I can't be a commentor
else my ass will be on a raging fire

Basis fundamentals of limericks

A notable Limerick - which won an Irish 'Listowel Writers Week' prize in 1998 - exemplifies the structure:

Writing a Limerick's absurd,
Line one and line five rhyme in word,
And just as you've reckoned
They rhyme with the second;
The fourth line must rhyme with the third

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

They all work I think. I think the first limerick is sort of off in the first line "Line Writing a Limerick's absurd,"
Line writing a limerick is absurd. Limerick's asurd sounds offbeat to me no matter how I try reading it.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

The first one is a sample
from the Internet
remaining r from urs truly
thanks for ur affirmation
how r u doing?

author comment

Thanks one day at a time

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

I thought en-masse would be better stock
weeping lot of poets for limerick flock
but take care I do say
get out of the guys way
or else your limerick will not clock

author comment

Nice limerick lovedly. What about "limerick's absurd"? It's drving me insane to read it.. Love u.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Tis day time here in this land,
the Limericks you have posted are grand.
Shall we wait for frosty Elf
To Critique yourself,
Or shall we write some more in the sand

Getting better maybe he will send you a silk "T" shirt lol,
Yours Ian.
PS:- please write above high water mark or your words will flow out to sea..

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

tee shirt filled with sand

author comment

read below twas really meant for you
since of limericks you had no clue
but now you alone
cannot cry nor moan
as limericks prize for you is due

author comment

that I will not be doing the critiquing. You will critique each other. It's an important part of the learning process.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

of being referred to as your father's daughter however you have learned/inherited his wordcrafting skills and abilities, perhaps you could us them in some situations to make concrete suggestions for improvements. Alas, as you say in this case, the poet seems to be meter-deaf, as some folk are tone-deaf with regards to music.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

....you could use them in some situations to make concrete suggestions -----
yes ,,,yes very few do...jess... u know
for improvements.

Alas, as you say in this case,..
the poet seems NO ,not seems ....
but is...
to be meter-deaf, as some folk are tone-deaf with regards to music.

author comment

folks still read me
your an expert I ain't
thanks for you sweet frankness
you could perhaps help improve them
i have never composed lyrics

author comment
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