Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Cowboy Up

a talker not a thinker
no faster than a drinker
wild wests
rattle snakes
put movement on the blinker

RAWRIDEMINHIDE!

spurred boots and grit
hang onto that shit
an appaloosa's
coming soon
to chomp the bloody bit

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
I'm new and wish to learn so please be ruthless
Editing stage: 

Comments

appleoosa..an amost camo coat
the free loaded light armor
of cav the spanish brought
with them

blinkers
the working class
blind
and enrich gain feed by
the imperical and colonial
tweaking

rattlesnakes
that enliven some
raw
beneath the hide
but lest denounce
the finish
proclaimed
with wear
the gloss
a dull sheen
shines

in practise
the moves
and intuition rides

Greatly admire
the gritty write
like the knowledge
of the natives not
using a bit far back
just commands and
feet and leg prompts
etc

I like the switch up
on the opening lines
Ive met both
coins
and been

a feisty write
Works well for me

Thank You!

thanks Esker, your in-depth analysis added some extra understandings for me. love the Spanish cavalry info . . . peace

author comment

said it

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.