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Antifib

Real eyes
realise
real lies

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

I said it as a quip in conversation and jotted it down in my (never-leave-home-without-it) notebook intending to write it up into a poem, then found that it felt fully finalised.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

there are so few real eyes

that so many are kept willfully shut.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

The Idea of eyes is to be seen

hearing is saying
and seeing is ....

aha! I dont know...

I like this...Its an internal and external
logic gate! We Unsee so much
as we are supposed too
for me anyway...

Stating....
in an illusionary world

I like the poem elf!
believe it or not I have many
who do not Unsee!!

Thank You!

I know many that feel this way..
others say Silence will allow you to See...
that kind of logic too...philosophy
and we have no voice...

but I think we do....
We speak and we assume
we are not heard
but people listen

People see
more then we know
and can assume
to not know

wise, insightful
and thank you

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

This is truly a gem of a thought which also has a phonetic grace. Good that you jotted it down and posted it hear.

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

There may be a buck in this one.
Nah.
Too real to realize two real eyes.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

Men have died for less, screaming with sharp things in their eyes. The 'nah' saved you. [grins].
Ta.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

I didn't real eyes
Or Understand
Not Under Stand
Understand is the floor
Understand??

Quite a quaint quip there young Elf,
makes us think and it hurts,
Where's those bloody pills.
Loves yu, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Interesting you would opt for realise instead realize and with three lines you are able to condemn a farce. Would like to see this expanded upon into full blown satiracal stanzas but enjoyed the dagger like quick quip, cheers

p.s. the drop bears aint got me yet old frined

that is just Anglo vs American spelling, Aussies use Anglo.
Yes, it was my original intention to use it as the base for a longer poem, however it just felt complete when I wrote it down.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

good one in so few words. My cup of tea of late, but don't ;et Wes know :) (more grins)

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
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there is room in the world of poetry for the very short and the very long, Wes claims to have learned from me and I have certainly learned from him.
Thank you, Rula.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

until you admit who your oft referred to father is.
If I got it first guess, just say so. You know that though we fought often we respect each other.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

it was you playing games, not me.
I respect your dad enormously. We fought like cats and dogs when we first met, probably because we are such similar ratbags.
Ok, all communication between us now is just about your poetry.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

It will start as soon as Wesley's "A Study In Pink" is finished.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

Get to work.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

awaiting corrections and suggestions.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

"Ayes" ....as in "the ayes have it"...In Parliament, meaning Yes!

'Nuff said.
Ells x

I with you have travelled around
Now I would like to break new ground.
A limerick is what this is all about
I shall try my best my dear Elf
Put my name down, it's lonely on the shelf.
Yours, Ian..

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

It will be a quick workshop,
one submission each.
More if you like, I'm not Tony Abbott

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment
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