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Scribblers piece for No 7 A Study in Pink

I'm here
Limited time to post so here goes:-

Mog floats the night, mist filled and dead
savouring *Jack's last fulsome taste
seeking someone to fill Jack's stead.
Mog drifts slowly, there is no haste.
Nearby it hears a scream and gurgle
decides to waft toward the scene
(did someone die in midst of burgle?)
The "taste” of fear is coloured green.

By the time I get to the fear's source
the well of rage is fleeing fast
and a crowd is gathering, of course.
Diverse emotions now are cast
There are five or six hosts here,
a pool of blood steaming and slick
All emotions not just fear,
which one to pick, which one to pick?

*
"Jack" is Jack the ripper. Mog's last host who he'd driven insane and who has just died from syphilis,
Stan

Last few words: 
As Stan has a problem with being at the comp for very long I have taken the liberty of posting his piece as above for the continuance of the story so far
Editing stage: 

Comments

Everyone critique both Stan's and Ian's submissions. Loved is up. I will repeat this message on the syllabus thread.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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He is an interesting character, wondering who or what he has possessed to cause the death of tragic victim. Good suspense and description.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

I agree that this is an interesting character.

Alid

this round and all subsequent rounds. Ian has submitted his, so it is your go.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

are you satisfied with this? I'm going to start asking before I move the sections to give the greatest opportunity to edit that I can. If you're good, I'll move it and set it in granite. If not, take more time to edit. We are not in a hurry to get things to the Main Thread.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

No, I'm not quite happy with it. If you see no change within a day or so go ahead and move it though......stan

Also
Ian I appreciate your moving this for me and my knees appreciate it lol......

Glad you could make it for a while, as the form said two eight lined stanzas I took out the break between your four stanzas to comply.
With Loved's piece we will have completed the first round or is there one more person to write, not to worry about that though the edit of the first part will probably tidy things up a bit.
Meanwhile you just rest now, even if there is an edit you wish to do, it can be done as and when you have time, just pop the edit as a comment or separate it will be sorted.
My healing to you and energy to Susan who has to carry you around the house La, La.
Yours as always Ian..

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

Don't want to hold things up so here are the edits:
Stanza 1
line 3 seeking someone to fill Jack's stead
line 4 change there's to there is
line 6 decides to waft toward the scene

Stanza 2
line 4 diverse emotions now are cast
line 7 and All emotions not just fear

Stan's edits have been incorperated so this one can be streamed to the main story.
Thanks for your Patience, Yours Ian.T
PS:- Mine can also go to the main story, I hear that Loved's is near completion.

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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I think all the characters are covered.
Mog seems to be the most probable suspect to the moment (imo)

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Please follow me on Instagram
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Limit to sixteen lines total and break them where you need to. I will wait a full day for Stan to make changes. No hurry.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

You and Mog are the most likely suspect as of this time and I congratulate you on a piece well done!
~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

But Mog arrive on scene After the murder. But who's to say that the initial murder will be the only one?

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