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Cognitive Dissonance

subdued by thoughts
amid trying
to force an ocean
through a straw
releasing only
seemingly reiterations
while hammering
for something
desperately trying
to escape
awake during
vespertine mornings
cocooning to something
vague and me
waiting to
reveal itself
and build room
for duo transformations
terrifying
but real and lovely
and loving
frustration of simplicity
inside a
complex discordance

SCREAM

sigh

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

You will end up with a dissociative personality if you carry on with this thought lol, if you should find yourself talking to the image in the mirror please stop, they are not real I think lol.
I think that this write is too much for the standard reader to assimilate or put into real life issues.
I am not sure who we write for here, is it the other poets or the world if it's the other poets maybe this is OK but to the world ??
Just my opinion, so keep writing, I read our Esker's poems and writes but most of them to me are a tangle of thoughts then there are the ones that are absolutely priceless, but this is the way of the world.
Take care young Lady and I look forward to your next write.
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

thank you for your comment. This poem isn't written for anyone, it's written for me. I feel like writing with the intention to please a certain audience takes away the true authenticity and makes it less your own. My poetry is solely my self-expression, just as art should be.
Also, I write my poetry in an intuitive way. Though i do always have a clear concept, sometimes i don't even fully understand them, so i wouldn't expect anyone else to. I suppose people can make it about whatever they want.

Amber

author comment

A lot of the time I write in the auto mood while music is playing in my ears.
I am a spiritualist and my Anne is an international medium, so your writing for just you is fine, and you are right about it not belonging to you if you should write for others.
I write a variety of ways and things, and in doing so never worry about who it belongs to, but you can do as you wish to.
I shall read your piece again and comment according to the write of you,
Take care little one know we think of you,
Yours Ian.T
PS:- Have just read your words again, now if this is of your self then take the time to step outside of that place you seem to find at peace.
It is a lie that will echo through time and there will be Amber surfing the waves of trust trying to figure if this is the right wave.
Disquieting times have been a haven yet the mind seeks to find the freedom of a pure thought without the scream..Ian

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I liked the poem. Good to know a poem happens to you spontaneously and you just flow with it like you have here. I especially liked the lines:-

subdued by thoughts
amid trying
to force an ocean
through a straw

they certainly did convey to me "a stormy mind"..was that your intent?

Regards.

raj (sublime_ocean)

Great use of metaphor ... I totally get it.

thank you for posting it, made my morning.

Richard

the guide the rule the creative the dare...
intuition.
true gold

thank you!

The thoughts expressed here feel genuine, honest, and powerful also! The form you used is not my cup of tea, but hey, that's your call, not mine! A great read regardless! Good job

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