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CELESTIAL ROSARY - Inspired by Henri Matisse' Red Studio

Submitted by Leonard on Fri, 2014-08-29 04:21

I linger
lovingly
on each bead

Nothing between
the bead and touch
No time, no space
no contamination
no taint

The delicate membrane
which separates
turns into thin blue
smoke
and disappears

At the confluence
of space and time
journey and arrival
I imbibe the essence
of being and becoming

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

weirdelf

Fri, 2014-08-29 11:22

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to Henri Matisse' Red Studio. Perhaps that is the point, in fact I'm sure of it. As sure as I can be of the inner workings of your mind, Matisse's or your theories of cosmology.

Love the poem.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
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Leonard

Sat, 2014-08-30 01:39

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of poetry or - for that matter - any art. After looking hard, admiringly and lovingly at the work, wishing I could produce a work of art as pure, as unprententious as that piece, I got the inspiration to write this. I wouldn't though, say that there is any direct relation. The relation is in my head.

For me, be it music, painting, poetry or sculpture, it is about the feelings it produces more than what is actually said or shown.

Thanks. Its always a pleasure to have you stop by, read and comment

Cheers

Leonard Daranjo

"When the waiting stops, the living begins"

author comment

wesley snow

Fri, 2014-08-29 12:13

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The only suggestion I have to make is concerning punctuation. I know a lot of poets eschew punctuation, but I think this poem would benefit from it.
Otherwise it is an excellent piece.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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Leonard

Fri, 2014-08-29 23:17

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has always been a dilemma. I keep feeling that the broken lines say it all. But honestly, I would like your feed back on this. It will definitely help me.

Thanks for stopping by. I really value your critiquing.

Cheers

Leonard Daranjo

"When the waiting stops, the living begins"

author comment

wesley snow

Sat, 2014-08-30 11:33

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The poet has an advantage over other art forms in that he/she alone can actually dictate how the art is perceived. A painter produces a work and then lets it go with the hope that his audience will understand. This is true in most art. The art is made and then released.
The poet however, can actually use words in such an order as to force the reader to read it as intended. Punctuation is a tool to better accomplish this.
In my poetry I use EVERY tool available to me. Punctuation guides the reader in a very specific way. It is something of a fad to write without punctuation, but I think that is cheating the poet.
Use everything you have... thesaurus, rhyming dictionary, dictionary and yes, punctuation. We want to make the best poetry we can and punctuation aids this endeavor.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
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Leonard

Sat, 2014-08-30 13:07

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I do indeed agree with you. One thing I really love is punctuation because it makes it that much easier for the reader to read and understand. I shall indeed be guided by your advice.

Thanks once again for your input

Cheers

Leonard Daranjo

"When the waiting stops, the living begins"

author comment

raj

Sat, 2014-08-30 01:30

This is intriguing like modern art and has a soft delicate feel.

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

Leonard

Sat, 2014-08-30 01:37

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The true test of art is when it makes people feel an inner churning.

I really appreciate your reading and comment. It means a lot.

Cheers

Leonard Daranjo

"When the waiting stops, the living begins"

author comment

Ian.T

Sun, 2014-08-31 04:35

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With the help of mere glass beads strung on a short cord , you can feel the universe fold and unfold its mysteries.
The whole point of things like this is to focus the think on what really matters..
A lovely think, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Leonard

Sun, 2014-08-31 04:45

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There is nothing more satisfying than a poem that goes down well with a reader.

Cheers

Leonard Daranjo

"When the waiting stops, the living begins"

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