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Confession of A Cheese Addict
My romance with cheese
started in my youth,
eating sandwich in peace,
it keeps my spirit aloof.
One bite and my heart is taken,
my taste buds do so agree.
It feels like the bliss in heaven,
is reaching out to touch me
It blends well in pizzas,
it tastes good, eaten with rice.
It brings beauty to lasagnas
It's irresistable, I'm hooked for life!
I can never get enough of it,
this I do confess!
Call me a fan, an addict,
I couldn't care less!
It's good, eaten
as well as spoken.
If you don't believe,
come and experiment
Say "Cheese!"
in front of the mirror.
See how your smile
seems wider, brother?
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words:
Just a fun write.
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Rula
Thu, 2014-08-14 13:23
hahaha
This brings a broad smile to my face. You can say that I share you the same kind of "addiction"
Give me any kind of bread and cheese for a month and I won't complain or ask for anything else.
I don't know about Singapore but you must visit Turkey to enjoy the unlimited types of cheese. Your true heaven is there. ;)
A VERY enjoyable piece... I mean what you have written not the cheese :)
PS. There are some verses where I'd prefere present tense, but it is only me.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
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alidzain
Thu, 2014-08-14 14:08
Glad you like it, Rula
Turkey, eh? Well if I have the money, I will check it out. Thanks for the visit.
Alid
Rula
Thu, 2014-08-14 14:15
Good revisions brother
Good revisions brother
What about (tasted)...[tastes?]
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alidzain
Thu, 2014-08-14 14:22
okay
I'm on it.
Alid
lovedly
Thu, 2014-08-14 15:20
say cheese please
then show another snap
with a cheeesy smile
say cheese please
snapster you don't have to eat it
just say
C H E E S E
alidzain
Thu, 2014-08-14 15:28
Cheese!
lucky me you can't see the gap in between my teeth.LOL
Alid
lovedly
Thu, 2014-08-14 15:31
BUT ur lucky
I have very few left
all the best
i will say
cheese
then u can guess
alidzain
Thu, 2014-08-14 15:38
too bad
can't see you here. How about a pic of yourself on the profile?lol
Alid
lovedly
Fri, 2014-08-15 17:01
use the only mirror
OF IMAGINATION
free heaven given
god sent
to those who believe
they can see or just believe!
Ian.T
Thu, 2014-08-14 19:04
Alid
A champion of cheese, well I love the Cheddar type and can eat it with a smile, but mix it warm it there it becomes something I hate lol.
Damn silly I know but that's the way of things,
Your write was good and made me smile without the cheese..
Yours as always Ian.T
PS:- it is no good for Sparrows it stick in their beaks lol
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
alidzain
Fri, 2014-08-15 15:32
Hello Ian
thanks for the visit. actually, cheese is only one of my fav food. I like to mix my food. Even tried eating rice with durian and I loved it! Yeah, I'm a little crazy that way and my sis used to roll their eyes heavenward and shook her head when they see my " special" ingredients .lol
Alid
Ian.T
Fri, 2014-08-15 19:10
Alid
The mind boggles at the thought of Durian and cheese on the same plate, though you had rice, lol.
Can you eat them together without a nose peg???
A saying from the old world
"You are a better man than me Gunga Din "
I wonder if you know where that came from,
I will check to see if I can find it here in this muddle of ether.
Take care out there and my thoughts to your family,
PS:- Alid I have found the poem with the reference to Gunga Din by Kipling it is a great read hope you like it, I put it as a Blog for all to see, isn't that good of me lol, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
alidzain
Sun, 2014-08-17 18:07
Here's the thing, Ian
there are many Asians like me who actually loved durians. Its a real treat for us. Yes I have heard that some Europeans or what the people here called "Angmoh" can't even stand their smell. Well, to each their own views, I say. hehe. Anyway its good that you people think that way or else we may not have enough to offer everyone.lol
Alid
Ian.T
Sun, 2014-08-17 18:36
Alid
Don't get me wrong, us here are war mongers, and in being that we have lived with the smell that a Durian puts out, from the many battles we have been in. We preferred the enemy to smell that way but shit happens, Gunga Din , to quote an old master LOL.
I am rarely serious, as I can't find any scientific proof that life is to be treated so.
Go well young traveller, and know we think of you, all my best to your folk, Yours Ian
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
alidzain
Sun, 2014-08-17 20:12
Same here, Ian
You and our friends here are never far from my mind. If I can find the idea, I'll be writing about Grace and how she first met with Dr Chaz. You remember them, don't you? It feels like it has been along while since the last time wrote about my characters....
Alid
lovedly
Fri, 2014-08-15 17:05
ian you have yet to join
the leaders three
Rula............ I and-------------- you
undiscovered list hackers
after a week or say within the week ones
shall go and drown in the Neopoets stream
let them dream
who dun nit
ALID MAY JOIN
Ian.T
Mon, 2014-08-18 04:19
Loved
Been there, dunnit, had the first "T" shirts printed, but it was not thought much of, so I didn't, I burnt the "T" shirts, but am willing to try again, lol.
There seems to be an empty space where the unpublished list was, but we must critique not just comment please.
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..