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today there is a burning fire ---- within me

The poetry please!

today there is a burning fire within me
to perform a newer kind of poetry
this ignites the infallible minds of humanity
such a kind of poetry
where two lovers face one another
and
as one smiles
air-full of kisses fly

and

the crowds in great abandon....
hide behind a veil of time

no clouds are needed...
they all want an audience blind

so be it my way to say
stay
do read my works
once in a way....

have a good night or day
where ever you are...
You may...
This is another thought of the day!

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

error posting

loved

author comment

If you got rid of the commentary, this would be a good poem, with a few small changes it could be amazing, you have some great lines in this its just a shame you spoil it with all the fru fra...

love Jayne x

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

any better tis?

loved

author comment

I second what Jayne has said about the intro..
The theme and the write doesn't need it,
as it can stand on its own words,
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

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