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ephemeral blaze

save for the pardonable,
leopard spots
forever inclined
knit over the dole
peregrine blanch
at speeds deduction,
why tell tales
processions metallic
into cumber cloud crashed
velocity's vapour, i?

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
all that is made of puff seems truly grasping air to feel, but truly feeling for audience
Editing stage: 

Comments

when i wrote this the leopard spots were the ink that saved the little emblem of the poem but the sorrow in me wanted to explore thematically more but i couldn't, this to me was cumber searching and i felt crashed like a plane hitting the cloud- the image of the plane in the sky is the procession metallic , also a falcon's flight reduced to the speed of subsonic solitude

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