Workshops on Neopoet are groups that meet for a certain period of time to focus on a certain aspect of poetry. Each workshop participant is asked to critique all the other poems submitted into a workshop. A workshop leader helps coordinate -- they set the agenda, give participants feedback on whether their submissions and critique are at they level expected of them, and after the workshop is over, give feedback to participants.
To join a workshop, first find one that is of interest to you. Once you have found the right workshop (and verified that it is open -- you can find this out in the description below), you can apply to join the workshop.
Comments
Barbara Writes
Tue, 2012-05-29 03:04
Haiku
We will start the discussion with Haiku. Haiku origin is Japanese. Its content is seasonal, does not rhyme, and is written in three lines with syllables of 5/7/5 per line.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Tue, 2012-05-29 03:04
Haiku
We will start the discussion with Haiku. Haiku origin is Japanese. Its content is seasonal, does not rhyme, and is written in three lines with syllables of 5/7/5 per line.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
author commentIan.T
Wed, 2012-05-30 11:09
Barbara
I have added a few of the Japanese writes to my on going Blog, with a separate Blog for Renga poetry but that also contains information on the other forms, I hope they are of some use to your workshop, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-05-31 23:19
Yes they will be very helpful
I will check your blogs for tips
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Fri, 2012-06-01 02:26
Barbara
Ref your signature:-
I took tablets many
Words and feelings in haze froze
Laptop better I know's
Couldn't resist LOL, Yours Passerine
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
thePoetess
Wed, 2012-05-30 15:43
Joining
I would like to join the workshop. I have written some Japanese form poetry before and it is something I enjoy.
weirdelf
Thu, 2012-05-31 06:11
Welcome poetess
What forms of Japanese poetry have you worked with?
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
thePoetess
Thu, 2012-05-31 15:07
haiku
I have written both haiku and tanka and a few senryu. I am wondering if you have ever tried the Brazilian haiku? If you wish to try it, I will give you the information.
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-05-31 23:20
Great love to have you join
Send me a pm
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentscribbler
Thu, 2012-05-31 22:00
Hi
While I await Barb letting me join I'll go ahead and jump in this discussion if that's OK. There are a lot of times some tiny thing in nature catches my eye. And it usually has to do with changing season. When the "prompt" does not seem like it will supposrt a longer work, I often try to describe it via Haiku. The challenge of Not using rhyme and having to condense the muse into this strict form is both a challenge and a lot of fun..............stan
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-05-31 23:22
That it is challenging and fun
One of the reason I thought of this workshop I figure many would enjoy it.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Thu, 2012-05-31 23:57
Ian has a great blog
Since Renga is a poem of collaboration it iwould be the last to be written. All participants is to write it after writing their haiku and senyru which could be done at the same time to show difference on the same post.
After the discussion of the definitions difference each will write their haiku and senyru and post to workshop. Then all will join in on the renga.
To get a better understanding how this form works go to Ian's blog it is very detailed with good information if you need be. http://www.neopoet.com/iant/blog/tue-2012-05-29-1347
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sat, 2012-06-02 01:32
Thanks for the eye lol
Most welcome
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Sat, 2012-06-02 18:16
Barbara
I would love to have a go at this workshop it should be fun,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Sat, 2012-06-02 21:43
Hey glad to hear that
Should I add you
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Sun, 2012-06-03 04:00
Barbara
Please add my name to your list, I have already written the Haiku's so will just await the grand opening, lol, Take care have a lovely day,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-06-03 07:18
Great
Will do
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Sun, 2012-06-03 23:05
I disagree that haiku has to be about seasons
We can not reproduce classic haiku in English. Let let it make it about nature, but with a signifier that gives an implication of human meaning
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-06-04 00:20
I agree haiku don't have to be about season
So to be clear about it would you give an example of signifiers with implication of human meaning. ;)
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Mon, 2012-06-04 00:42
Haiku I Totally agree beau
It has the spirit of nature with human significance. I read , I like. Thanks for sharing.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Mon, 2012-06-04 12:15
Hi we are off to the races
I'm having sooo much fun with this workshop. I'm looking forward to running this race with all of you. I gonna add my Haikus to day. We need a minimum of four people for Renga and we have it.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Wed, 2012-06-06 08:58
Feedback
Remrmber we all must give feed back on each poems I'm not seeing much. When time avails please give each other feedback.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentwesley snow
Sat, 2012-06-09 23:14
barbara...
are you here?
I can't see you. I can't seen anything but shapes. I'm surrounded by little people talking in tiny little poems I don't understand.
Beau? Where are you? I'm scared. Am I supposed to be in here?
Stan, help. You know I can't do this. Tell them I can't do this. They'r going to make me write with only three lines. Tell them Stan. Tell them I don't know how.
I'm so very frightened.
I don't see my name on the list.
Am I dead?
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about
scribbler
Sun, 2012-06-10 00:12
lol Wes
Not only 3 lines but 3 Short lines . Just take a deep breath and stop writing when the exhalation comes then pare it bach even more. If this ol' southern dunder head can do it anyone can. BTW You know those lines of poetry which pop into your head that don't seem to have sufficent duration yet have substance? Ideal fodder for Japaese forms.........stan
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-06-10 19:22
Hey Wesley
The workshop starts today. Sorry wasn't here had to get caught on some homework before expire dates. Three lines is rather simple.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Sun, 2012-06-10 03:22
Wes
It is about time someone started cutting off your over long lines and made you come out with short to the point lines LOL
I will look so forward to your trip into misery I know what I will do for you there is a lovely place on line something to do with pulling teeth and syllable counts you will find it here:- http://www.haikuwithteeth.com/index.php
Take care out there we are waiting for your effort, Yours Ian.T La La
PS:- there was a GI that thought that all Japanese were short little guy's until about four of them charged at him in the war they were all around six feet and built like brick S H's...
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-06-10 20:44
Well all Workshop starts today
We can start off by each one giving there definition of an haiku, senyru, and tanka, since they are closely related.
Haiku are forms of poetry that originated in Japan over 300 years ago. Haiku poems are very short set of words that often expresses a unique thought or feeling. It is a short poem that records the essence of a moment keenly perceived in which Nature is linked to human nature. Diffinition from here http://haiku-poems.50webs.com/
Senyru are forms of poetry unrhymed and similar to haiku in structure and written about human emotions etc.
Tanka The Tanka poem is very similar to haiku but Tanka poems have more syllables and it uses simile, metaphor And personification. Tanka poems are written about nature, seasons, love, sadness and other strong emotions. This form of poetry dates back almost 1200 years ago. http://www.edu.pe.ca/stjean/playing%20with%20poetry/Hennessey/how_to_wri...
Haiku originated from tanka in structure dropping off the last two lines.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Mon, 2012-06-11 12:34
I've added you Wesley
Don't know how I left off your name. Looking forward to you haiku.
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author commentwesley snow
Mon, 2012-06-11 23:39
Write it now, Barbara?
Now?
I'm ready.
Now?
wesley
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about
wesley snow
Tue, 2012-06-12 11:38
Pa-lease.
You're lucky to get three lines from me.
wesley
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2012-06-13 00:41
Wesley
Have fun Wesley
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentscribbler
Tue, 2012-06-12 22:00
hi Wes
Actually the syllabus calls for four Haiku and Senryu and both forms prohibit rhyming if I'm not mistaken. A poem of similar form which rhymes was developed by a site member and is called Rhyku. Maximum 4 lines, max. number of words per line is 7 and this form Must contain at least one rhyme.........stan
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2012-06-13 00:31
New
Gotta check that out.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Wed, 2012-06-13 04:12
rhyku
This is to be added to the A-Z of poetic forms Blog, Yours Ian.T
rhyku (plural rhykus)
A short poem invented by the poet "Joel Mansfield"
Combining a short haiku-like form with elements of rhyme.
Usually 3 or 4 lines in length.
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2012-06-13 11:47
Okay
Will look into this after I get pass fast past homework and midterms. Sound fun Back to homework got cass tonight. This was my litttle break.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentWilliam Saint George
Sun, 2012-06-17 11:41
I find
haiku a bit too foreign for me. Have tried once, but it didn't tickle me enough. Personally, a rhyming couplet does more justice to a thought, (and is easier to write) but I'm curious. That, probably, is all that really matters.
I'll stick around and read to my delight. :) I've just not been taken over completely.
No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot
http://www.wsgeorge.com/
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-06-17 18:51
you are more than welcome
stick around you might find some delight in this fun poetry form
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Tue, 2012-06-19 06:06
I can't believe the agonies
you guys you are putting yourselves through.
Japanese poetry is an imperative to any modern poet. Rather than the endless bullshit and moralising with lousy storytelling of say, Lord Byron's 'Don Juan', you can speak the most perfectly cut gems of the most singular words if you try. We all, each and every one of us need to learn it in order to be relevant, interesting, profound and not relics of a lost form.
And that will only add to each of our poetic skills repertoire. Whichever form we choose.
Listen for that mental gasp that follows a good haiku/senryu.
I am finally going to recommend you to my own accomplishments in this field, look at each piece singularly and as a whole. Criticise as harshly as you can.
Haikookas
http://www.neopoet.com/node/2669
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Tue, 2012-06-19 06:59
great Jess
i read them all and they are good . i like them all .
looking for your 4 haikus for the workshop. and so forth
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Tue, 2012-06-19 07:02
great Jess
i read them all and they are good . i like them all .
looking for your 4 haikus for the workshop. and so forth
or is these it.
then looking forward to your senyru
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Tue, 2012-06-19 07:09
To me brevity is perfection in poetry
To make each word count for everything it can.
It's not the same for other poets, but learning the perfect expression of minimalism will expand any poet's ability to express themself in any form.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
scribbler
Tue, 2012-06-19 08:12
Hi Jess
You probably won't believe it judging by my usual writes but I'm a true believer in the "less is more" mantra and Haiku and Senryu are about the epitome of this............stan (plus as I've said before, it's perfect for capturing those moments which won't support longer forms)
wesley snow
Wed, 2012-06-20 21:46
Stupid question time.
How does one pronounce "senryu"? wesley
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-06-21 20:14
not so stupid
I'm not sure. I pronounce it
"Send you" lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentscribbler
Sun, 2012-07-01 15:01
hi
Pronounced just as it's spelled.......................stan
Barbara Writes
Fri, 2012-06-22 16:43
r heard it pronounce
so i guess whatever goes
unless you heard it prounced.
then there it is.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBlueDemon77
Sat, 2012-07-14 01:02
pronunciation of Senryu
SIN-ryoo
Ron
Blue Demon77
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Ian.T
Sat, 2012-07-14 03:13
Ron
I am going to report you to the PC committee..
You want to bring SIN into our lovely Japanese writing.
There are places for such words and writing, trouble is the entrance fee is becoming bigger and bigger it use to be one penny.. La La Sparrow
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
BlueDemon77
Sat, 2012-07-21 20:48
Unfortunately.........
It's even the emphasized syllable.
Ron
Blue Demon77
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Ian.T
Sun, 2012-07-22 02:59
Ron
Sorry, Sparrow got out, some thought he had a point, but we sent them away lol,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Fri, 2012-06-29 22:06
Hi everybody
we will begin the round robin once everybody has all theiir haikus, senyrus, and tankas, posted. any who havent; done please do so now. i know you all are waiting for the last part. i cant wait myself. Stan i dont see your Tanka have you submit it and im overlooking. Wes I see one Haiku and One Senyru, do you have anymore, I see Ian and Jess has completed their the three. Set me straight if im missing any. lol
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author commentscribbler
Sun, 2012-07-01 15:03
hi Barb
Sorry to have slowed things down. Been busier than a cat in a room full of rocking chairs. Will throw a Tanka together in next few days................stan
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-07-02 08:29
Okay
I realize how busy you must be. Just sending reminders :)
Looking forward to your tanka and presence in the round robin.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBlueDemon77
Wed, 2012-07-04 05:15
Hi Barbara!
I appreciate you letting me join so late in the game. I can't submit my 4 haiku tonight since I'm not on the list so I can't enter them as workshop related. know about the one one Tanka and two Senryu assignments still outstanding and the group Renga. Thanks for agreeing to let me attend. I would love to be on the list so I can get what I have turned in.
Thanks Barbara!
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-07-05 23:07
Hi all I see there is only three of us ready for Renga
Renga will be starting soon, so those not there yet and those who are there, I think Sunday is a good day to start the round robin. Finish your Haikus, senyrus, and tankas then comment on each others submission and rally around for the final submission "Renga" at the round robin table.
sounds like a lot of fun
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-08 21:25
I have updated my blog.
http://www.neopoet.com/barbara-writes/blog/sat-2012-06-02-1010
As I said the Renga will start Sunday. At the moment four of us have completed all three exercises for the workshop.
Ron, since you are ready you can write the first three lines about whatever you want, then wait for Me to add the second two lines.
Ian can write the next three accordingly, then wait for Jess to write the second two accordingly.
Stan can write the next three line, then Ron can add the last two lines.
Everybody get a opportunity to write the first three lines of the Tanka for each stanza. while the other write two lines making each stanza five lines.
since there are five of us there will be five tanka stanzas for each participant.
If there need to be any adjustment let me know. And I'll do accordingly. by this time there should be three stanzas of Renga. Anybody else joining later i will assign avvordingly. Any question feel free to ask.
I made a change to the Renga exercise after reading a couple of websites on renga today, I notice its the one who crafted the renga that write the two line of the first stanza.
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author commentBlueDemon77
Sat, 2012-07-07 22:16
Thanks Barbara!
It's a great honor to do the hokku! Thanks, I'll do it justice.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-08 21:15
Renga Update
Hi everyone,
Ron` since you are first, post your first three line of renga here in the worshop , not on the stream.
as everyone post their lines i will make a copy adding all the lines together then i'll ` post back here for final commentary from everyone,
All composers of the Renga, name will be in the poem's signature. Ian` you are good with the signiture in your Tanka so you can create the final signature line that includes all composers of the Renga. Right now the composers are Me, Jess, Ian, Ron, Stan, Wes. Changes and additions will be done accordingly.
Once everyone is satisfied with the Renga Jess` can post to the stream on behalf of the workshop.
Any questions feel free to ask. if i left any thing out that need to be included or explained let me know.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBlueDemon77
Sun, 2012-07-08 15:52
Hokku (first three lines of Round Robin Renga)
earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
Ron
Blue Demon77
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-08 15:56
Sounds Good
I can see this going many ways. cant wait to see what Ian adds
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author commentIan.T
Tue, 2012-07-10 13:42
Renga
I know it is Tuesday I had missed the first part from Don but here is the next piece 2 X seven syllables
Walking in summer 's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind.
Talk to me in whispers now
Take care all look forward to the rest of the Renga, Yours Ian . T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Tue, 2012-07-10 11:48
Thant great Ian
I reassigned you to the next three line as I went ahead and did the next two after more research on renga. the adjustment is posted here up top somewhere.
just add another line to the two you have here. that will start a new stanza, then Stan i think will post the next two to your three.
then Jess i believe has the next three then Wesley. since Wes is understandably mia at the moment we will start over and Ron will add the two to Jess's three and so forth.
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author commentIan.T
Tue, 2012-07-10 13:45
Barbara
Just a small adjustment to the words and off we go again, can you PM if this happens as I haven't the time to scan all posts, Thanks young Lady, Yours Ian.T
Walking in summer 's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind.
Talk to me in whispers now
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Tue, 2012-07-10 17:26
Ian
sure
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-08 21:10
I learned
Wesley is temporaily Mia
so we five will carry on until he is able to be here.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-08 21:30
Everyone
As you may already realized, I am readjusting and editing the instructions as needed. So, check the "I have updated my blog" comment box for new updates and adjustments.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-08 21:55
Second Two lines of Renga
earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
scatterers blown by the wind
find their way in this grand world
Barbara
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Tue, 2012-07-10 17:33
Renga Addition
Earth pulls us downward
To regain its lost children
Birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
Find their way in this grand world
Walking in summer's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind
Talk to me in whispers now
Ron, Barbara, Ian,
Stan it is your turn i think
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author commentweirdelf
Tue, 2012-07-10 21:50
next verse
Earth pulls us downward
To regain its lost children
Birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
Find their way in this grand world
Walking in summer's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind
Talk to me in whispers now
lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Tue, 2012-07-10 22:31
Thanks Jess
nicely done
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Tue, 2012-07-10 22:37
Stan
We're waiting for you.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sat, 2012-07-21 23:32
Do we want to start from the first person
Adding the next stanza. Or do yall want to end and post to stream. Seems momentum down.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBlueDemon77
Sun, 2012-07-22 09:52
Hi Barbara!
I would vote let's move forward, I'd be glad to write the next required part if that is the consensus of you and/or the group. Please let me know. I'll monitor the thread regularly.
Thanks!
Ron
Blue Demon77
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
scribbler
Sun, 2012-07-22 10:07
Better late than never
Last stanza :
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came...........................stan
weirdelf
Tue, 2012-07-24 23:06
Let's continue!
Earth pulls us downward
To regain its lost children
Birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
Find their way in this grand world
Walking in summer's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind
Talk to me in whispers now
lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came
Let's continue the round robin cycle on the same poem, these things can go on forever and we have some great stuff here. That would make it Ron's turn next. My only suggestion is that we read what has come so far and try to maintain some coherence, as you saw I did with my contribution, referring back to ideas already presented.
I'm excited about this and would love to continue.
Ready Mr. Ron?
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 14:39
Jess
thanks for picking it up again. im in the middle of finals and a family mess.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 14:39
Jess
thanks for picking it up again. im in the middle of finals and a family mess.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 14:39
Jess
thanks for picking it up again. im in the middle of finals and a family mess.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 14:39
Jess
thanks for picking it up again. im in the middle of finals and a family mess.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 14:40
Jess
thanks for picking it up again. im in the middle of finals and a family mess.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 14:40
Jess
thanks for picking it up again. im in the middle of finals and a family mess.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Fri, 2012-07-27 15:05
wow six times
how i did that lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentscribbler
Sat, 2012-07-28 07:41
LOL
BARB HAS FOUND A WAY TO INCREASE COMMENTS ROTFL...............stan
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-29 08:29
Lol
Lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Sun, 2012-07-29 08:37
This iss a wonderful workshop
let's continue the Renga
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Ian.T
Sun, 2012-07-29 10:01
Later Ron
Later on we have waited a while,
and now lost our smile,
so I have been a naughty boy
and am sending this two liner for you to toy:-
There to lie in turmoil’s grace,
our goodness to the Earth replace
Now we can get on Ron Ron, Yours Sparrow,
PS:- just waiting for the worms that take the leaves yum yum, couldn't wait any longer....
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-07-29 16:19
Good two lines Ian
We waited long enough. Nice. Who's next.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBlueDemon77
Wed, 2012-08-01 00:38
Rengu continued
the husk is buried
used container for spirit
what then lay within?
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
BlueDemon77
Wed, 2012-08-01 00:43
Rengu continued
I thought it was over.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
BlueDemon77
Wed, 2012-08-01 00:42
Sorry for the delay
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Ian.T
Wed, 2012-08-01 02:53
Renga
WHAT IS A RENGA?
A RENGA is a group of HAIKU-LIKE verses linked in any one of several special ways. It is usually written by two or more poets who take turns writing the verses.
In classical RENGA, 3-line and 2-line verses are alternated,
Beginning with a 3-line verse (a hokku, usually approximating 5-7-5 syllables) resembling haiku and indicating a season.
A second poet composes the following verse (2 lines approximating 7-7), linking it by one of several methods (not too obviously, please) with the first.
The next verse (of 3 lines), composed by the first poet (in a 2-person renga) or by another (in renga written by more than 2 poets), links with the second but not with the first.
So we have a (3 lines) then (2 lines) to carry on until the boss says that will do.
So good luck with this venture and give Barbara your full support,
I think that Barbara wouldn't mind if others asked to join in to see what we can do as an end product ....
This Renga thing goes on for at least 36 parts so keep your eyes on the ball,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-08-02 12:09
thanks Ian
thanks for the definition of Renga. It will be helpful for any who still don't quite understand what it is. Yes, if any want to join they still can and is more than welcome.
glad to see you rejoin us Ron lol.
Earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
find their way in this grand world
Walking in summer's warmth
freedom of the quiet mind
talk to me in whispers now
Lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came
There to lie in turmoil’s grace,
our goodness to the earth replace
The husk is buried
used container for spirit
what then lay within?
okay who is next?
i check to see who is in line, either Stan Jess or Me.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Sun, 2012-08-05 22:37
You or Stan, Barbara,
because my last verse was a 2 liner and I'd like to do a 3 liner.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-08-05 23:00
Thanks appreciate you helping me
I'll go
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Sun, 2012-08-05 23:35
Hi two more lines
Renga
Earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
find their way in this grand world
Walking in summer's warmth
freedom of the quiet mind
talk to me in whispers now
Lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came
There to lie in turmoil’s grace,
our goodness to the earth replace
The husk is buried
used container for spirit
what then lay within?
The silence of nature speaks
a beseeching gaze restrained
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 00:08
next Renga
Earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
find their way in this grand world
Walking in summer's warmth
freedom of the quiet mind
talk to me in whispers now
Lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came
There to lie in turmoil’s grace,
our goodness to the earth replace
The husk is buried
used container for spirit
what then lay within?
The silence of nature speaks
a beseeching gaze restrained
by grace, thought and need
mere abundance eloquent
to find our way home
.
.
.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 00:08
Yours Stan,
for a 2 liner
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
judyanne
Mon, 2012-08-06 00:50
sorry
may I point out some syllable discrepancies?
'Walking in summer's warmth' … 6 – should be 5 ?
'talk to me in whispers now' … 7 – should be 5 ?
'our goodness to the earth replace' … 8 – shoul be 7 ?
love judy xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 00:55
You are correct
Thanks somehow I missed that
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 01:02
let the anarchist ring in,
for the sake of this renga especially, and considering that syllable counts are only a rough approximation of the Japanese sound units, lets focus more on the evolution of the poem. I've tried to stick to vowel counts, but would willingly skip or add for the sake of the poem.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Ian.T
Mon, 2012-08-06 02:31
Judy
Stanza three was originally written for Stanza two because Ron took a while to act on this one my stanza was put down one so instead of a 7-7 it should have been a 5-7-5, it was never corrected.
Now that you have noticed Stanza three, must be changed to:-
In summer's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind.
Talk in whispers now
Hope Barbara will edit the whole thing again, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 02:51
Sure Ian
Not a problem consider it change
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentBarbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 01:28
Sound okay to me
Well be moving on
To Stan
I like what we have so far. it sounds good read as one poem so far
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 01:58
You like my new pic?
You may have to press F5 to update it.
I swear the new image is nothing to do with the TV show "Breaking Bad", teehee
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 02:04
Bald is good
Me personally prefer hair lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Mon, 2012-08-06 13:54
Who is that Man
Is it a Buddha? is it a philosopher? is it Capt; John Luc Picard?,
No! now listen to this:- It's Our "JESS," There must be a poem in this.. Hairless and Hatless in a kookaburras nest, or something LOL.
Oh! the reason for this write, an update to the Renga as my original stanza was incorrect:-
Earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
find their way in this grand world
In the summer's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind.
Talks in whispers now
Lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came
There to lie in turmoil’s grace,
our goodness to the earth replace
The husk is buried
used container for spirit
what then lay within?
The silence of nature speaks
a beseeching gaze restrained
by grace, thought and need
mere abundance eloquent
to find our way home
Slow disintegration starts
Return to pure particles
Yours Ian.T
.
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 02:58
Thanks for revising and posting Ian
I appreciate the help kepping things straight in here lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentjudyanne
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:02
oh dear ian
i know jess will say it doesn't matter - and it doesn't really lol
but
'In summer's warmth' has only 4 syllables :)
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 14:56
thanks Ian
for posting your two liner. I appreciate how each of you guys add your lines to the renga then repost it in its entirety. helps me alot.
Im sure its Stan turn this time lol.
like Jess said this can go on forever. so, how many stanzas do you guys want to add before we make a final proofread and close for submission to stream.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Mon, 2012-08-06 18:29
Barbara
I think that the usual number is 36 lol but it can go to hundreds Maybe put a deadline on it by date like Xmas???.
Yours Sparrow
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 22:29
Lol
We wer thinking likevgivevit another week.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:05
You pay me too much kudos, Ian,
but kudos is my only viable currency, so I owe you some.
A valid and pertinent change.
Now we await Stan or anyone else who might ring in. Rengas can go forever.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Ian.T
Mon, 2012-08-06 04:05
Jess
Instead of Kudos, can you send me some Kuku in Biltong form it is one of the best non veggie things there is LOL.
Take care and have a great evening, Yours Ian.T
PS:- Just found this at the end of my Pen LOL:-
Hairless and Hatless in a kookaburras nest
It’s a new sweet baby, shall we will call it “Jess”?
Its heart had been broken, and it had gone astray
But I hear that with tender care, he is back today.
We send people for a cat scan to see what’s wrong
Not this young bird with his laughing song
We sent him to a better place, in the outback there
A cattery, that looked after him, with tender care.
I would say that he is now full of lovely beans
But cats eat mice, and many other nasty things
Not sure who or what is there, that heals the soul
Maybe I shall take a trip there so I will know.
I think that to travel to the other side of the world
To check out a cattery for my own soul is absurd
My padded cell here, and the odd kind word to me,
Is all I need at this time of my life, don’t you see.
To leave young Jess to fledge and fly the nest,
Is what I have been told is for the best.
So I will sit in the corner of my cosy padded cell
And tell the rest of the world out there, to go to Hell
I'll give him Kudos LOL
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:19
Here is where we make errors
Then corrections, revising and editing before posting to stream is done here. We get to see collaboration at work. The workshop is working as expected I think.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:31
and isn't Ron due a verse?
where are you Blue Demon?
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
BlueDemon77
Mon, 2012-08-06 10:44
Not yet....but monitoring
Yeah, near as I can tell it's Stan. Barbara did a two liner, then Ian did a three, I did the three prior to Barbara. I'll be checking daily at least once.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:38
Jess
Ron did "the Husk "
I think it's Stan or Ian turn
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:43
Barbara, I forgot to mention
The silence of nature speaks
a beseeching gaze restrained
is bloody lovely, it has that frisson, that inexplicable thing that japanese poetry needs.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2012-08-06 03:56
Oh thanks I appreciate
Coming from you it's a honor
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Mon, 2012-08-06 13:52
Barbara
Just a two liner for the carry on:-
Slow disintegration starts
Return to pure particles
Now we can go underground maybe killer lurks or just a worm for Sparrow lol, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
BlueDemon77
Mon, 2012-08-06 19:35
Renga continued.......
Earth pulls us downward
to regain its lost children
birds long left the nest
Scatterers blown by the wind
find their way in this grand world
In the summer's warmth
Freedom of the quiet mind.
Talks in whispers now
Lost children blown windwards hear
the noisy silence of choice
Like all falling leaves
we will find our way back to
earth from whence we came
There to lie in turmoil’s grace,
our goodness to the earth replace
The husk is buried
used container for spirit
what then lay within?
The silence of nature speaks
a beseeching gaze restrained
by grace, thought and need
mere abundance eloquent
to find our way home
Slow disintegration starts
Return to pure particles
Under yellow sun
seeping into the dermis
though we are not there
To keep us moving..... : )
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2012-08-22 08:34
Hi All
I wanna thank everyone for participating. I hope you all had fun and benefited in some way from this workshop. I will be closing it now.
This worshop was such a success that i thought sharing it with the everyone on the site as a gathering place for poets who want to be a part of something fine would be nice.
Everyone is invited to come to Renga poetry time at "Eternal Renga".
Keep on the watch
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentweirdelf
Wed, 2012-08-22 08:39
Barbara, if you are going to finish this workshop now
post the complete Renga to the Stream, not as part of the workshop, and feel free to write a final verse to finish it. But remember to give credit to all who contributed. You don't need to say who wrote which verses.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2012-08-22 09:21
okay
will do
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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author commentIan.T
Wed, 2012-08-22 16:46
Barbara
Thank you for all the effort and time you put in to this workshop.
I as many others enjoyed the change, and the learning curve.
Our Love to you as always yours Ian.T & Friends
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
BlueDemon77
Wed, 2012-08-22 17:39
Thanks Barbara!
Very enjoyable workshop, and I think, a very successful one.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Barbara Writes
Thu, 2012-08-23 12:19
thanks Ian and Ron
I thought differentt and variety might draw more people to participate>. It was better than I expected. Glad you all liked it.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
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