it is population control.
there are just far too many
winged "saviors" flying around.
giving halo glow hope to any
fool with knees on god’s ground.
dropping on beggars below a sly
mirage of miracles exchanged for pride.
so I pan my scope across the sky
and pump lead into their heavenly hides.
it is population control.
they fall within my killer reach
and my demon dogs run to retrieve
the church owned feathered leech
invented solely to make believe
above the body, I slay a slave device
and I spill its blood with logics blade
sending it to its heaven at my hells price
curious, as to what an Angel’s flesh is made.
it is population control.
so I fire up my righteous grill
and anticipate crispy divine taste
for nature has taught if blood you spill
the only true sin is resource waste.
taste buds catch fire as I chew
for trapped in the meat of the slain
is an evil known only to clergy few
and history’s lies it does contain
it is population control.
down my chin dribbles the juice of hope
and the stolen wills of past disciples
no smell more bitter than scent of a pope
dispersing fears with cross and rifles
the feeling left in my swollen gut
is that of a heart burn bible ache
warning that I should not have cut
so deeply into religion’s rotten stake.
it is population control.
Hi Daniel
Too bad you didn’t enter this poem in the contest that was held in March (I think) on religion vs. atheism. May I recommend my poem “Fine Line” for your reading pleasure.
Always, Cat
On its way to excellence
First rate content, and the form is pretty well done. It wants a little polish, but only that. (I’m thinking, for instance, that you could get away with the slight rhyme fault in L6 & L8 caused by dropping the ‘s’ in ‘prides’ to gain a more natural phrasing around ‘pride’ than that you have now.)
Suggestion for doing any further edit work: Do it backwards. Start with the last lines and work toward the first lines. Works for proofreading prose, too. The rationale: you won’t get distracted by the content quite so easily. You’ve already done the content up brown; don’t screw with it anymore.
pride
Removing the “s” on pride had crossed my mind but I thought it would hurt the rhyme.
I now have read it a few times without the “s” and I agree with its removal.
What does the reference “up brown” mean?
I tried to research it but cannot find a definition.
-Daniel
"Doing it up brown"
A kitchen reference. Take a steak and cook it in a skillet over a medium flame. “Do it up brown.” (Cook it until it is browned). Then it’s well done.
By extension, a thing ‘done up brown’ is well done.
Serve with mashed potatoes and gravy, after a tossed green salad.
Evocative, Daniel
I’ve come to expect no less from you.
Strong, powerful, and raw.
Raised Catholic here and now choke on the mere thought of all the wasted years.
Of course, that is only my opinion - after 13 years of their schools and mantra.
Particularly clever use of the homonym at the end.
Ronda
Population Control
What do you use for a decoy to lure them in?
Maybe the piss-scent of non-believer draws them to you.
This was cynical and clever. I like the light-hearted
way you battled serious issues. It reminded me
of political cartoons - how one picture can say
so many serious things while being funny as hell.
So far I am really digging your style - keep up the great work!
piss-scent
maybe I simply piss my own pants and smile upwards at the flock of gulls.
:)
-Daniel
Can we Spell Blasphemy?
No really I can hear this read like a revival sermon.Critical dogma’ bits my heels
angels nip me like harpies.Sweet revenge.
In ink,
Dabbler
The scent of your piss must be as intoxicating as your wit
I suppose I could serve you a platter of compliments to join your cleverly deployed entree, but I believe many have already preened your feathers in that respect. So much at stake with this mouthful, yet as always you daringly don the rifle and spare nothing but the unbridled carnage of truth. Perhaps I should say, perspective, truth delivers too many a chance of ambiguity and there’s no trace of that in this season’s message. You have pleasing symmetry and format, cunning verbiage and rhyme, all and all a mouth-watering subject that leaves the mind with something to chew on.
Anticipating another crispy divine taste.
<3
a sister to the fates