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Barbara Writes
United States
Submitted by Barbara Writes on 22 March 2008 - 12:05am.| Updated 23 March 2008 - 8:31am.
Style / Type:
freeform
Distrust behind those eyes
I cannot trust because of the lies
Sadly to say with words that tears
Your heart you will not share
Dreams I dreamt are now wasted
I try to show my love of patience
Woefully you made me hurt
Falling deeper into dirt
I have withdrawn into seclusion
Where peace is not a delusion
Stares that shows no trust
Touches my heart turning to dust
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
(2 votes)

I have withdrawn into
I have withdrawn into seclusion
Where peace is not a delusion
Stares that shows no trust
Touches my heart turning to dust
Yes I liked this. Short and full of emotion the closing lines are very good indeed.
Just one very tiny point that made me stumble a little as I read:-
Dreams I dreamt is now wasted
Should I think read are now wasted but apart from that this was a good read.
Kaz
It’s impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside.
Thanks kaz
Barbara Writes appreciate you reading and sharing your suggestion.