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Submitted by poewriter58 on 2 March 2008 - 5:44pm.| Updated 2 March 2008 - 8:26pm.
Style / Type:
freeform
Your voice travels the telephone wire above
It’s a voice that I know
I’ll not tire of
For in its depths there lives a smile
and in its breadth there is no guile
The sound of my name upon your lips
Soothes and quiets my mood
Then away to you my thoughts will slip
With all my fears subdued
Your smile and voice is all it seems
To set my soul at ease
For now, you only share my dreams
And thoughts of you they must appease
For in our lives we have not met
Our fingers never touched
But you have touched the heart of me
And your heart in mine I’ve clutched
My belief in you will never end
As I hope you can attest
I hold you dear, my forever friend
Far and away from all the rest
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
I invited Candlewitch to co write a piece for my next book and this is what she and I came up with
(3 votes)
Hi Ladies..
This will be a fine addition to the book..this is how its done!
Structured and it all fits..very nice indeed.
thank you Richard
It is easy when you have someone that knows you like a book working with you
Chrys
This was an enjoyable read...!
I love to read rhyming poetry like this, that is so smoothly written that no ending punctuation is needed–and it still flows so effortlessly when read…!
I noticed only one slight issue with the grammar/punctuation… Regarding the apostrophes used in the word “it’s” in 2nd stanza (i.e., “it’s depth/it’s breadth”) I am pretty certain that the apostrophe signifies a contraction of “it is”, so removing apostrophes might be appropriate here.
Great poem, Poewriter and Candlewitch; and good luck on the new book!!
“If I had a prayer, it would be this: God, spare me from the desire for love, approval, or appreciation…”
- Byron Katie
Many thanks
you are indeed correct I have taken care of the errors actually I was not paying attention to my typing thank you for pointing that out to me
and thank you for those very nice comments
Chrys
Hey Poe
It was a real pleasure working with you! Thanks to all who have posted responses.
Cat
Ah Cat
Hey I’d like to say it was a pleasure working with you as well but hey I can’t do that (lol) what are friends for I may call upon you again we just fell into this one didn’t we
Thanks Cat
Chrys
wonderful poem
great job on this poem you two..
It will make a wonderful addition to your book…
the title drew me in .. and kept me there from beginning to end..
a beautiful poem by two wonderful people..
BrownEyesBlue
thank you
from Cat and I
you really can hear a person smile
Chrys