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Submitted by themoonman on 4 December 2007 - 6:11pm.| Updated 4 December 2007 - 6:11pm.
Style / Type:
freeform
I hold my head up and wade through the world,
but it’s not the same.
Without your brightness,
I’m withering in the dark.
On Saturday I’ll bring you a flower.
There is a bluebird on the window sill.
The greenhouse is overgrown.
I can’t pull it all together.
The kids have their own lives,
and I miss you.
There is still a faint sweet smell of you
in the closet I can’t clean.
I only open it on bad days.
We didn’t have enough pictures.
On Saturdays, the bluebird visits.
I leave some crumbs,
take you a flower,
talk to you,
and I miss you…
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
(3 votes)
i am sorry man
I am sorry you are so lonely I feel it in your writing. I am glad you are with us though. I’m glad you can still find a happy feeling - keep that
Truly,
Mark
a single point in the infinite circle am I
This one is so personal
It feels almost inappropriate to comment. But I know what you feel, so the poem is a success.
cheers,
Jess
wishing you a Salubrious Solstice
Thank you for the reaction...
I mean I feel I must say this is only a write. A sad picture I could see so clearly, I had to write it down…
Realistic picture of healthy grieving.
well written.The title real says a lot to how some get too deep into grieving.
In ink,
David
Hi Nobox...
thank you for your comments…they are much appreciated….
themoonman...
raw and real…excellent…I can’t say anymore
Frost
Thank you Frost...
I was kinda proud of this one when my sister read it and in tears asked me where the hell did that come from…she writes as well..thanks for taking the time to read and comment. You are very talented and for you to say it’s excellent…well, damn.
just maybe I hit the mark with this one.
Richard
I like this title very much
I often times try for one word titles and the feelings you have shared the smell in the closet when I lost my wife by divorce I kept one of her pillows I took from her side of the bed and kept it in a space bag so I would have her scent such a strong reminder I feel the wading and the loneliness unfortnatly the space bag over powered it after a few weeks but I kept it on my bed for years anyway Donnie/ Sinbad
Donnie...
I’m glad this one touched you and sorry it did at the same time,
as I said before this was just a write, something I had witnessed
but not to the degree that was written as I added some of me in
the write… put myself there.. thank you for bringing this back
to my attention as this was a special write for me…
Richard
It sounds as a lementation
It sounds as a lementation for a departed soul. striking both the beraved and others fantasising
R.M.
thank you for going back to read this write…
your thoughts are well received!
Richard
Richard
Way to go, you just keep getting better. Awesome write,
Sincerely, Linda
Linda...
I’ve said it before, you are a fresh light here!
thank you
Richard