Grow as a poet. Get honest feedback on your work. — Register Free
Docmaverick
United States
Full Profile
2 comments
Make a comment
Other article tools
Submitted by docmaverick on 5 September 2007 - 7:13am.
Style / Type:
Western Classic
Left alone she pictures things
as she’d like for them to be,
but she’s quite aware of everything
going on in her family.
Attempts are made to teach us
and guide us to what is right,
in hopes we’ll learn each lesson
and act accordingly when out of sight.
But choices and situations
can overwhelm us in the end,
and poor decisions and consequences
will try and teach us once again.
Whether she is proud of you
or disappointed just the same,
her eyes may show the difference
but she’ll never curse your name;
her quiet grace won’t let her
even though she’ll lose her calm,
she has a special kind of love for you
that’s why God made her Mom.
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
(2 votes)
Hey
Nice poem. A Mom never give up, right?
I think you brought up some really great points.
You did it again Doc!!!
Hi Doc
Your words reach into my heart and capture it with each poem of yours that i have read!!!!! This is truly what every mom is like.
“Whether she is proud of you
or disappointed just the same,
her eyes may show the difference
but she’ll never curse your name;
her quiet grace won’t let her”
Oh boy how true this line is!!
Thank you so much!!
Kind regards
Feebie
Mistakes happen, do not dwell on them, live them, mourn them and move on to better things. (PS: if that does not work eat lots and lots of chocolate)