Neopoet.com

nice job with this. i liked it

I liked the poem. Language is also good. It’s very much free flowing and didn’t find anything like forced stuff! Only thing I would like to say that if you would have written one more stanza that would be little better. Though this is just my personal opinion. Overall it’s a nice work!

Your words are very powerful.Good job!

Succinctly expressive.

My favorite lines:

“That I bury
The corpse of your love
In my heart’s graveyard”

Thank you so much my friend, for reading and commenting. So glad it got your attention.
Those are my favorite lines too…

Sincerely,
Wafi

“Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!” ~Afzal Shauq~

The title is an attention grabber. I have to admit that at first I was a little bit worried about you, but as I read the poem I understood. A powerful piece, and I’m glad I read it. My favorite lines are the same as Kenneth’s.

Always, Cat

Thanks a lot Cat, my friend, for reading and commenting. So glad you liked it.
I appreciate your thoughts a lot.
Your comment left a sweet smile on my lips….

Sincerely,
Wafi

“Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!” ~Afzal Shauq~

Wafi,
The title I felt a little scary, like Cat said
language use good [except capitilization at start of every line not necessary]
Theme very good!

_____________________________________________________
Income-tax forms should be more realistic by
allowing the taxpayer to list “Uncle Sam” as a dependent
Anonymous

Thanks a lot Janice for reading and commenting. Your thoughts are always appreciated here.
I like the capitalization, I think it makes the poem look neat ;)

Sincerely,
Wafi

“Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!” ~Afzal Shauq~

Hi Wafi, I enjoyed this write (although I do wonder about the title, maybe you need to put the ‘love’ in there too? just a thought) The piece itself is great, such levels of meaning and some wonderful imagery. I sense a bit of frustration, I think ;). Great write Wafi, got me thinking and I appreciate that, much love Beki xx

Thanks a lot Beki, for reading and commenting. I liked your suggestion.
Apperciate your thoughts a lot.

Sincerely,
Wafi

“Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!” ~Afzal Shauq~

So glad to see you Janice, my loving friend. Hope you are doing well. Thanks a lot for the sweet comment, always appreciated my friend.

Sincerely,
Wafi

“Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!” ~Afzal Shauq~

sometimes so much more is said
with a paucity of words…that’s
what you’ve done here.
i really like that you have
conveyed strong emotion
with a few, well chosen and well
placed words. i also like the structure;
this short verse seems to fall down the page…

like tears.

cheers,
p.

p.s…great title too!

Powerful but beautiful. Great words of meaning, set out just right and I enjoyed this.
Love the title.

Thanks for sharing.

Love Lyz. XX

Hi Wafi.
What a great use of words, simply beautiful.
loved the ending. { committing love suicide.]
a very well written piece.

Mantiscepter

Hi Wafi.
What a great use of words, simply beautiful.
loved the ending. { committing love suicide.]
a very well written piece.

Mantiscepter

Wafi,

I like this so much

great and meaningful …….. simple and honest

darya

your use of words is very phenomenal, i love the whole lines used, this poem is very deep, am glad i have the honor of reading your works.

chumfin

you show us in your words what we should all be doing. john

your use of the words in this poem were heart warming,
you make me melt!

love
esperanza
xoxo