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Submitted by Lotus on 2 July 2009 - 6:24pm.| Updated 2 July 2009 - 6:24pm.
Style / Type:
freeform
All together stand as one
Nothing but anothers son
Black and bruised
Always used
Vanglorious race
Put back in thier place
All together stand as one
We’re all burnt by the sun
Venal Villains
Kill by the millions
Fascist reich
It’s time for strike
Three!!!
Your out
Does it help at all to shout?
I wont quit ‘til your done
All together stand as one
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
I wrote this when i was in jail.
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Lotus...
this poem’s meaning is alluding me… I mean, I think you are
talking about peace, hence… all together stand as one
we’re all burnt by the sun… but, then there is the
kill by the millions
fascist reich
it’s time for strike, by the way, maybe “to” instead of “for”
vanglorious… isn’t a word… did you mean vainglorious?
venal villains… venal, great word… easily bought
then of course I read your jail quote… and it makes me
think this was prison gang related…
could you help an old man understand the poem…
Richard
No problem richy,It is about
No problem richy,
It is about peace, the “kill by the millions” is saying that the faschist reich is the one doing the killing.
Yeah i did mean vainglorious thanks for bringing it to my attention.
And no the poem is not gang related when your in your jail you usually have to kick it with your color but since all of the white guys in there are racist or at least pretend to be i wouldn’t associate with them it made it pretty hard living in there but the indians and crips didn’t seem to dislike me so much so i tried to kick it with them mostly. i guess thats where the inspiration for this poem came from. I’ve been a white anti-racist actavist for going on 4 years now.