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Purplemoondoll

purplemoondoll's picture
Advocate Volunteer
East Anglia,
United Kingdom

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Two witches sir, no maybe four.

Somehow they’ve made a spell.

And Girdlestone is in it now

Condemn them all to hell.

 

They’re out to get me, mark my words.

Please save me from this savage plight..

Bewitched my heart and made me ill.

I want them dead or put to flight.

 

They’re out to get me, hurry now.

They stole my silver spoon.

Perhaps they’ve used it for their herbs.

They’ll kill me very soon.

 

Four witches sir, no maybe five.

Somehow they’ve made a spell

And Girdlestone is in it now.

Condemn them all to hell.

 

They’ve set about my brother now.

Bewitched his new machine.

We have no rent, we’ll be turned out.

Please help by any means.

 

The landlady has been bewitched.

I saw them go and see her.

Such evil cannot be endured,

If one in Christ doth fear.

 

Six witches sir, no maybe eight.

Somehow they’ve made a spell

And Girdlestone is in it now.

Condemn them all to hell.

 

They’re after my beloved sir.

Those nasty, evil bitches.

They’re telling lies behind my back

And he believes the witches!

 

The whole town thinks I’m evil now.

I don’t know how to end it.

God bless you sir, please make a charm.

You know the place to send it.

I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Please do not critique mechanics. The inconsistencies in style are intentional, or correcting them is not important to me.
A poem about witchcraft hysteria in Norfolk during the 19th century - based on letters sent from Sara Macklin - a young woman from a local village who fell on hard times. Girdlestone was one of the villagers.
4.333335
Average: 4.3 (3 votes)
Submitted by weirdelf on 15 August 2007 - 6:28am.
weirdelf's picture

Really enjoyed this

even though slurs on witches really get my hackles up, some of my best friends…!
Should we know who Mr. Cobel is? A warlock or a witch-hunter?
I love the way the increasing number of witches in each stanza bespeaks the hysteria, how every little or major wrong gets turned on the scapegoats.
Very well done.
cheers,
Jess

Submitted by purplemoondoll on 15 August 2007 - 1:10pm.
purplemoondoll's picture

Mr Cobel

was indeed a cunning man
Who’s knowledge was a treasure
He could find spoons and cure the sick
And even forecast weather!

Thanks for your comments Jess.This kind of attitude sits badly with me too when most of the condemned were innocent. In this case Ms Macklin’s paranoia fell on deaf ears! Story was too good to miss - three letters each adding more witches to the plot. Kaz

Submitted by barbsdad2003 on 15 August 2007 - 9:30am.
barbsdad2003's picture

Nicely Done!

Your cleverness here is a wonder beheld. And I indulged my beholding with great pleasure.

Though I tried without success to tamp it down … for fear the sharp-eyed bitches — er, witches would notice me.

Thanx again,
Chuck

Submitted by barbsdad2003 on 15 August 2007 - 9:37am.
barbsdad2003's picture

I Might Add ...

Incidentally, my herbal eye gets a workout in my backyard. Not trusting in the safety—not to mention the nutritiousness—of our country’s food supply, I include unpesticized and unfertilized backyard weeds as a major portion of my daily meals.

With normalized blood sugar as a side benefit.

Maybe those witches could share with me some of their knowledge re such things as wild herbs and such. Of course then I’d have to rely on their goodwill regarding my best interest.

Regards,
Chuck

Submitted by purplemoondoll on 15 August 2007 - 1:32pm.
purplemoondoll's picture

Thanks Chuck

Lot to be said for this these days, especially with the rubbish they use to harvest and produce food. As for weeds well a lot of herbs are mistaken for weeds and have extremely beneficial properties so good on you!

Thanks Kaz

Submitted by purplemoondoll on 15 August 2007 - 1:03pm.
purplemoondoll's picture

And

Thanks for your witty and brilliant critique - very much appreciated!

Cheers

Kaz

Submitted by orgami on 19 August 2007 - 1:42am.
orgami's picture

what is beloved in the deep of hearts content

what is it
what could witchs want

in duos in tandems in triplets and foursomes

speaking their tongues
their crooked endevours
and riddles with rhymnes

in my old culture they speak of
bearwalkers
people to fear

fear fear fear
is fair and far
but what child
keeps their eyes
and memories on
such peoples

even now i fear
the “they’s”
and “them”
from “then”

so there
thats all
from me
me

you see

..O..

Submitted by mark on 20 August 2007 - 8:07pm.
mark's picture

What to say

that I just smiled on through this and I don’t even know why. Witchy!
Thanks doll,
Mark