Like moving to the East Village, but easier on the wallet. — Register Free
Barbara Writes
United States
Full Profile
11 comments
Make a comment
Other article tools
Submitted by Barbara Writes on 6 October 2008 - 12:47am.| Updated 6 October 2008 - 6:23pm.
Style / Type:
Western Classic
Poetic Equality
Modesty and humility
is a poet’s best quality
no matter the training or family
the source is the Almighty
Blessings are abundant
with the One who grants it
with a little talent
we cannot take for granted
A poetic pen
that makes a poet grin
was with the One in heaven
before the world beginning
In his image we were created equal, though different,
but not entirely.
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
(3 votes)
Very Good,
Barbara,
I like it. Except for the last two lines.
(werel) should be “were”.
Maybe those last lines should read:
“In his Image Created were we,
equal but different, but not
entirely”
just my opinion.
Good job all and all.
thanks,
Eddie
“if I trip over a can of beer, am I drunk?”
Eddie I change rhe last lines
Smiles:)
Barbara
I use though because ‘but’ twice in the last two lines seems redundant to me.
thanks for the suggestions appreciate.
Barbara
I liked this piece, but it seemed to stop before you said it all.
As to the Eduardo that, “if I trip over a can of beer, am I drunk?” I thinkl the answer is “if you had a can of beer, then did trip over” I would worry,LOL
Barbara, Keep up the good work,
Yours,
Ian.T
Hi Yenti
Smiles:)
Barbara
Any thoughts that i need to cover is welcome.
Did not want to over do it. Just wanted to keep it
precise and to the point.
Thanks for the input.
Ian,
I can’t remember if it was mine, I had a blackout just before I started drinking
again. LoL
All day Eddie,
thanks
Yes I agree
Smiles:)
Barbara
Eddie i Like your suggestion. I will change the last lines.
Barbara,
thank you for accepting.
Eddie
I'll have you know
I haven’t dropped a drink. The drunker I sit her the longer I get or something to that effect. Anyway Barbara, I liked the poem a lot. Poets being modest and with humility? Wow, that would be something wouldn’t it. *LOL* most of us are extroverts of a high order. *G* Well done Barbara. Very well done.
Respectfully,
Rett:
“We can all be thankful that Picasso wasn’t a plastic surgeon.” Rett
Rett
Smiles:)
Barbara
thanks for all your help and responses
they are very valuable to me.
Heavenly advise.
Hello Barbara…a valuable poem indeed…I think we all need some form of reprimand some time in our lives…no matter who we are…and what we are…
thanks a lot for …
Rahbar.
Rahbar
Smiles:)
Barbara
thanks for responding glad you feel that way