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Submitted by Pleides on 12 May 2008 - 11:44pm.| Updated 13 May 2008 - 9:06pm.
Style / Type:
freeform
Poem for Israeli and Palestinian Friends on the 60th Anniversary.
This grief, too long denied,
Has shown its face in dreams
As some thin ghost.
From sleep, you’ve woken, wept,
When its ungentle wings
Stroke your cheek with sorrow.
This grief, too long denied,
Has seen your life undone.
When you would stride ten-leagues,
You falter, held aside,
By this unresolved thing
A blackness holding back.
This grief, too long denied,
Has held your life unopened.
Kept out the sights of Spring.
New days have dawned,
Whilst you locked in your evening’s past
Are slowly dying from its cause.
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
(1 vote)
>
you are able to peg out words the way I have to dodge, I admire that. great work here. amazing
It seemed to me the title could have been
Poem for a Palestinian Friend on the 60th Anniversary….. I have good friends on both sides of this tragic situation.
Thanks for reading and your very kind comment.
Pleides
>
and you live in new zealand, do you travel often?
This flightless kiwi
has travelled a lot…..;-)
Pleides
Nice piece of work
It perhaps could stand extending a bit, but I like it as is. I really don’t understand your reason for the use of the archaic “whilst,” however.
Yours in peace,
Synchro
Extending and whilst
Thanks for reading and your kind comments.
I don’t think I can extend it anymore, for me there is no more to say.
Re Whilst….I first wrote while, then whilst, then back to while, until finally it needed to be whilst. The reason for this is that the conflict, which is the subject matter of the poem, goes back way beyond the last 60 years, to an archaic time you might say, Also, when I read it out loud, whilst requires for some reason a pause, and I hoped this pause would accentuate the ongoing tragedy today the poem addresses and which is the conclusion in the last line.
Thanks again for reading
Pleiades