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Submitted by orgami on 26 September 2008 - 11:50pm.
sometimes
a pain is there
that never can be
reached
like a flower in the garden
seeking sun
but never getting some
just runs out of time
before a season is
done
before the darkness
comes
I can see why you posted this here and not in the stream
it is a plaintiff plea, not up to your standard.
I suspect substances involved.
Although it still rings of your beautiful poetic voice.
cheers,
Jess
…
…
Hi O...
I think if you changed “some” to enough, it would travel through the readers
mind more clearly… substances… maybe.. but I think it is more a look at how
delicate life is … and some live a short life and we are all searching for the
perfect spot to shine in… and so be it.. it is so.
getting carried away…
Richard
of course...
I could read it wrong… damn substances…ooops.
lol
Richard
Great Write
Reading dying slowly you get a sense of your mortality.
Have you heared the song “Shooting Star” we all are shooting stars
some taking a longer orbit to complete there trip, some are brought into the world and then they are taken right out of it, they came in so fast and went out so quick but no matter how short or how long we have, We all leave foot prints on peopels shores it’s up to them to see if they know we are there before our foot prints are washed away and all that crys are the origami seagulls.
So again great write.